Darkness within
by MissingMommy
Summary: All is well and good, when James lives next door to Lily. That was until she was 10, he moved, breaking every promise he made. Now her life became a living hell and there is only one person who can save her. Hopefully he learn in time. J/L S/oc R/oc
1. New friends

Okay, I thought I would post this before you try to read the entire thing only to realize it was just an Author Note. I really am sorry for posting this.

I just wanted to let you know that this story has hopes. I am reposting it today. I have twelve chapters written and eight beta'd. I am in the process of writing the thirteen chapter right after I get done posting this.

Please expect the new story to be changed slightly. Nothing to major has been changed thus far. It just contains more vivid details, much better grammar, and better writing styles.

It will BE the same name as this. I am thinking of changing the summary, but for the first few chapters, I won't. Please if you subscribed to this story, go check out the newest one.

It will be updated once a week at the very least. I have motivation to finish it and a solid plotline. My beta, Heart of Spellz, is the most amazing beta ever. She gets my chapters back to me within two days. So expect speedy updates.

Thanks for reading this, because I know I hate a/n's.

MissingMommy


	2. Raylie and Ryan

-1Dis- I own nothing, if I did I would be the richest person ever.

A/n- I am so glad you like it, but this fanfic is going to get a lot darker. Just be warned. Also I am sorry about the slight delay.

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As the months when by, James and Lily got closer. Nothing could pull them apart. Lily often spent the night over at the Potter's house. She had her own room and everything. James's family was thrilled that James had found a best friend within weeks of moving.

Lily woke up to James turning on his bedroom light. "Hey time to go," he said quietly.

Lily stretched and rubbed her eyes. Mrs. Potter was pregnant with twins, and James had called claims to naming one. It was time to sit in the emergency room for hours while waiting for the twins.

Lily fell asleep on James shoulder while sitting in the waiting room. James was quietly talking to Susan.

"Yeah, I can't wait," Lily could hear.

"Me either. Dad says mums a boy and a girl," Susan said.

"I wanna name the girl," James said quietly. "I already know what I'm wanna name her. I put a lot of thought into it too."

"What thought you can mange," Susan laughed.

James glared at her, before changing his glaze to Madelynn. Madelynn was sleeping silently in a hospital chair, looking very uncomfortable. Madelynn always looked peaceful during sleep, her mouth pulled up in a small grin unlike when it was a straight face.

James' eye lids started to get heavy from depriving sleep this long. He looked at the clock on the wall; It read 11:58. He saw the back of his eyelids for what felt like a second before his dad jostled his shoulder. "They're born. Do you want to see them?"

James rubbed his eyes before standing and stretching. He walked silently next to Lily. "Happy Halloween, James," Lily muttered to him.

"What it's Halloween?"

"Yeah, like 20 minutes ago," Lily said motioning to the clock in the room.

"Well, Happy Halloween to you too." James walked up to his mums bed with Lily, Madelynn, and Susan. He seen a pink blanket and a blue one.

"I wanna hold the girl mum," James asked immediately.

His mum handed him the pink blanket once his was sitting safely on the bed. "Susan, and Madelynn you get to name one, and James you asked to name the other," Mr. Potter said.

"Raylie Brooke," James smiled down at the small baby inside of the blanket.

"Okay Raylie Brooke it is," Mrs. Potter said, "The boy's name?"

"Ryan," Madelynn said immediately.

"Benjamin," Susan followed.

"Ryan Benjamin," Mr. Potter repeated.

Ryan wiggled in his blankets, his hazel eyes wondering around. Raylie's mystifying blue eyes slowly fell until she was sound asleep. Raylie was the only on in the Potter household that had blue eyes, everyone else had hazel eyes.

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Months flew by since the birth of Raylie and Ryan on that faithful twelfth strike signaling the beginning of Halloween. They were growing big. They could know hold their own bottle and needed to be watch with a careful eye.

James and Lily sat in the twins room. James was holding Raylie, like he always did. Lily had Ryan sitting on her lap.

Raylie was starting to grow black hair. Her clear blue eyes was a startling contrast to her pitch black hair. Ryan looked just like James, minus the full head of hair and glasses. His hazel eyes lit up with amusement when Lily tickled him. Lily and James sat in silence til the twins fell asleep for their naps. James placed a kiss on the top of Raylie's head and gently put her in the crib beside him. Lily evenly put Ryan in his crib and shut the door quietly behind them.

Everyone could see James care so much for that blue-eyed black haired girl. They walked into Lily's room, which was a soft red with a hint of gold in it. "I'm gonna have to save Raylie from all those boys when she gets older."

"Yeah, Raylie is really pretty. The guys are going to be all over her," Even for a almost eight year old Lily was smart for her age, follow along with James. It was a huge surprise that Lily didn't know about the Wizarding world yet. They hid it well.

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Lily stayed over at the Potter's house more than she stayed at her own. The days became weeks which in turn became months. Lily's birthday had came and gone, being on of the best birthdays she ever had. She turned eight this year.

James and Lily wondered around their neighborhood. They were talking about a subject she hasn't had to think about in over 6 months. She went home to get a new tube of toothpaste.

"They just looked at me and started yelling as if I did everything wrong. I ran into my room locked the door, sat down on the floor right behind the door. I cried," she admitted quietly.

"I promise you they wont hurt you. I promise you I'll always protect you. I promise everything is gonna be alright. I promise Lie," he promise fiery. He said pushing Lily in a swing they stopped at.

"Are you sure?" she asked.

"Perfectly."

They stayed in peace for hours. Only when they saw the sun slowly go under the trees did they head for home. A safer, quieter peace.

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Fall loomed around the corner as Halloween swiftly, silently, and knowingly approached. Raylie and Ryan could now crawl all over the two story house, even up the steps. With a little help from James of course. Only James taught them to go up the step, not down. It was when Ryan fell down the stairs that James realized he didn't teach Raylie or Ryan to crawl down the stairs.

Raylie now had pitch black hair to her chin, and Ryan's was to his ears. Raylie's eyes were the focal point of most conversation between Mr. and Mrs. Potter. Nobody in that house knew where she got her startling blue eyes from, but Raylie looked drop dead gorgeous even at a year. Her blue eyes had that mischievous sparkle about them and could capture anyone under their spell. Ryan's hazel eyes weren't as mischievous as hers nor had that captivating spell to them, but they were still beautiful.

James looked at Raylie with so much love an affection. Lily at times just wished he would look at her the same, but what she didn't know was that he did. It was the day to focus on Raylie and Ryan, to shower them with gifts and other goodies.

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Halloween lingered only a little more, just giving them enough time to enjoy taking Ryan and Raylie trick or treating.

November flew by without leaving much of a feeling of existing. The count down for Christmas Day started around the Potter's house. The tree was put up and the gifts now lie underneath it.

Christmas Eve started less than twelve hours ago, only having to wait twelve more. Hour by hours they counted down, as they always do. Finally the clock stroked 12 and everyone cheered, loudly and happily. James handed out the gifts to the rightful owner.

Lily had gotten and locket with her initials engraved on the back along with James', of course from James himself. She gotten a beautiful green dress from Mr. and Mrs. Potter. Madelynn and Susan had given her chocolate and lots of it. It had been one of the best Christmas's ever.

James put Raylie and Ryan to bed with the help of Lily. They were to tired to go to their own rooms, so they cuddled up into a rocking chair and quietly talked. "Lie, I wanna ask something."

"What Jay?" she said using the nickname she came up with.

"Would you like to go out with me?"

"What?" she questioned looking at him to figure out what he meant.

"Well Susan told me when a person likes someone they ask that person to go out with them," he explain quietly, blushing.

"I like you, so yes I would," she smiled, cuddling even closer. The room faded from her eyes soon after that.

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A/n-I know I skipped a couple of months. But the reason behind it is I'm trying to the sad/better more interesting parts for you. So next chappy a little about when they are dating, but mainly Lily finding out they are moving. So about 2 years are going by next chapter.

Lie and Jay are their nickname I thought of. Remember they are 8. Raylie and Ryan are a little over 1 and Susan is 10, Madelynn is now 11. About to start Hogwarts.

Please, please, please, I beg you to review. It would mean so much to me.

I'm outta here

M.M


	3. Moving, heartbreaks, and anger

-1A/n- Thanks everyone who reviewed. I had to start writing this because the thought just wouldn't leave my mind.

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Months had gone by since James asked Lily out. Lily was happier than ever before. Nothing could destroy her happiness, except one thing. Lily was summoned to her own house one day. She was quaking in her shoe. They called her over to tell her that she wasn't suppose to be there, that the Potters' didn't care about her in the less because she was a mistake. Yelling their usual speech.

Lily walked silently up to her room at the Potters'. James could feel that Lily was upset. He sat quietly on her bed, waiting for her return to her room. Lily walked into the room to see James sitting on her bed.

She shut the door, slid down the frame. James was there in an instant. He quietly pulled her onto his lap, rubbing back her hair. He was muttering comforting words in her ear. After a while she finally broke. Tear poured don her cheeks. She buried her face in the crook of his neck, wetting his shirt with her tear.

He let her cry, not bothering to talk. He held her closer than ever before. Her tears dried after a while. He wiped away the stray tears. He decided to ask why she was crying.

"They just wanted to tell me I'm a mistake. The usual speech. Telling me I'm useless. That nobody loves me, or wants me to be around, cause I only cause mistakes. They could take me out of the world because they brought me into it. And I don't get why it hurts so much," Lily sobbed once again.

"Listen, they just want to put you down. You're not a mistake, you're the best thing that happened to me. You're not useless. You don't cause mistake. My family loves you. I love you, I _need_ you. And I swear that if they lay a hand on you, it'll be the worst mistake of their life. I promise I'll be your guardian angel. I wont leave you. I'll always be your crying shoulder, here to dry your tears," James muttered softly in her ear.

They just stayed like what felt like a lifetime. The peaceful silence was welcoming, and needed.

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James watched Lily closer after her episode. She looked perfectly fine, but he knew that her parents words were still eating at her soul. There was nothing that could save her from that pain, he just wishes that there was a way.

James watched quietly as Lily tickled the giggling Raylie. Raylie and Ryan were now able to walk. The twins were so playful and mischievous. They got into anything they could get their small hands around.

He smiled as Susan started playing with Ryan and Raylie. Madelynn soon joined the fun. James couldn't resist the tempting scene. All the older kids started messing with Raylie and Ryan. After a minute the twins figured out that they could dog pile the older ones. They both fell over Susan and Madelynn. Lily and James laughed as the girls tried to get Raylie and Ryan off of them.

Their birthday were closing in. They were about to be two. It was a week from Halloween. Everyone loved their birthday because they always took the twins trick-or-treating.

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Halloween had finally made it to the present time. Susan, Madelynn, James, and Lily all got the twin and themselves ready for the yearly trick-or-treating.

Raylie and Ryan always got the most candy, because of them being so adorable. The twins were hyper since James decided to give them lots of sugar before they left. The muggles who were giving out candy kept asking how old Raylie and Ryan were.

Susan, Madelynn, James or Lily would reply with, "They just turned 2 today." Of course the adults had to awe, and give them even more candy.

They didn't get through all the houses in their neighborhood before Raylie and Ryan were sound asleep.

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November come and went, just leaving the cold as a feeling. December was winding down. Christmas Eve had made it there.

Raylie and Ryan fell asleep early so they could be up at midnight. Susan continually pouched on Madelynn. Madelynn would jump on her as well. It was a very good method of keeping awake.

Lily and James was in his room. Their voices was low. They were talking about random things. James glanced at the clock, noticing it was one minute til Christmas. He pulled her into a hug, watching the clock.

"Happy Christmas," he said, kissing her softly on the lips.

"Happy Christmas to you too," Lily laughed. She pulled him down stairs.

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Lily's birthday was here. James had a surprise for her. He took her out to her backyard.

"What are we doing here?" she questioned.

"Your birthday present."

"Why would it being in my backyard?" he smiled at her.

"Because it can be," he said sarcastically. She rolled her eyes. He stopped, "Happy Birthday." In a tree in her yard was a treehouse. "Do you wanna go up?"

She nodded, as he lead the way. They climbed the ladder. Inside there was a small couch, a sleeping bag, a radio, and a small table. A perfect living space. She smiled, her eyes big. She threw her arms around him. "Thanks, I love it."

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"WHAT???" James yelled. The room had a silencing charm around it for this purpose.

"You heard us James. We have to move. Voldemort is tracking us. It'll only be a few days more til he knows exactly were we are. You don't want to see him kill Lily do you? Because if we stay any longer she'll die," his mum explained slowly, and evenly.

"Why don't we just do a unplotable charm?"

"The muggles know where we live," his dad said calmly.

"You have a choice. You can either stay here and watch Lily die, or you can save her from the painful death. You have to chose now," his mum said evenly. It broke her heart to see James hurt like this.

"Fine, I'll hurt Lily to save her," he said after a while. "But how am I going to tell her?" he questioned himself.

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Lily looked at James, who looked miserable. She saw filled boxes, and didn't know why. Nothing seemed to be there anymore. "Lie I need to talk to you."

"Why Jay?"

"You'll find out, just follow me," he said in a broken voice.

He took her outside. A moving truck was parked outside. Most of the boxes were in the truck, only the boxes she seen inside were left. Lily turned on James. "You're _moving_?"

His eyes looked hurt as he looked at her. He wasn't smiling. "Mum's making us."

"Why?" Lily asked, pain could be seen in her eyes.

"Mum wants to see the world. And of course Dad will agree on anything she says," he lied.

Tears broke from her eyes. "Don't go please. You're the only thing saving me."

"I have to," was all he could say.

"You're breaking your promises. How can you. How can you do this to me?" Lily yelled.

His parent called his name. The twins wandered over to Lily, clinging onto her legs. She kneeled, hugging both of them. Susan walked over next. "You're like a sister. I'm sorry about this."

Madelynn hugged her, "I'll see you again someday."

Lily cried even harder. James pulled her into a hug. Everyone turned around and walked towards the moving truck. He took that moment to kiss her. He kissed her longer than he normally would. He pulled back, "I'll always love you Lie. Always. Please don't hurt yourself. Please. I promise I'll be seeing you soon."

She fell to the ground crying harder than she ever has. She watched as the Potter's drove down the road, not looking back.

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A/n- not as long as it could be, but see the dark things are coming up in the next chapter. Them moving will play a big part in this story, and on both of their lives. So will his sibling. So this is where I will leave you til Butterflies is updated.

I have to get off.

M.M


	4. Pain is just a word, NOT

-1A/n- I couldn't leave you hanging like that, no matter how much I like to.

This is darker than previous chapter.

WARNING- this is sad, depressing and dark. Includes attempted suicide and death.

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Lily's life had been destroyed the day James moved away. Lily now had to face her parents on a daily basics. The mental abusive quickly formed into physical when they found out that her guardian angel was missing.

Months had gone by since James moved and Lily found herself on the floor quite often, more than she liked at least. Blood spilled from her nose and mouth as she lay there breathless. She watched as Petunia stared at her unwilling to help.

She made a new friend though. Severus Snape. He was always there to pick her up from the blood-stained floor. He taught her how to fight. Only having to take on fist not the two.

Even with receiving less bruises, her life was still miserable. The one person she truly cared for left her broken hearted. She slid down her door from on of the 'family times' sobbing. She sprang up and ran to her table where scribbled on a piece of paper. After she finished she folded it putting into the pocket of James' hoodie he left behind.

She got out a rope, while standing on a chair she hung it from her ceiling fan, before wrapping it around her neck. She kicked the chair away, and the rope tighten around her neck, slowly but surely cutting of her breathing passages. Exactly what she wanted.

At the last seconds of life, a figure hurried into the room. He cut her down, and helping her breath again. After a while she realized it was Severus again to save her.

A week weeks pasted before she tried cutting her wrist, with that same note in James' hoodie pocket, but Severus was always there to save her. She didn't know why, but he seemed to want her alive.

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James was tormented. He'd left in January and it was now October. Raylie and Ryan's birthday was coming up in just a few day. They'd be turning three. This year it wouldn't be as cheerful as the rest. The only reason being he didn't have Lily.

He still wondered how she was doing and has been tempted to owl her. Madelynn and Susan went of to Hogwarts, so it was just James with them.

He heard noises down stairs. He grabbed the invisibility clock from his chair, hiding under it. He moved down the stair, as stealthily as he could. He noticed Susan and Madelynn were back. A confused look crossed his face, they were suppose to be at Hogwarts.

James noticed the look on their faces, his dad explained what the imperior curse could do and how the looks on peoples faces are slightly different. Madelynn was shaking her head. It looked like she was trying to fight it. Suddenly she screamed bloody murder, "Run, Death Eaters," then the confused look appeared.

Mum and dad would be proud of Madelynn. He looked at the clock at the very least there was five minutes til Halloween. _One hell of a birthday present, _James thought. Raylie and Ryan were able to walk or run when necessary.

Less than a second later Death Eaters started searching every room. They collected Madelynn, Susan, Raylie, Ryan and his parents in the living room. A Death Eater spoke, his voice disoriented. "Is there any more?"

His parent looked for James. James poked a hand quickly out of the clock, and he knew his parents were going to say, "No, everyone is here."

Raylie and Ryan whimpered. The Death Eater took the curse off of Susan and Madelynn. "We want to see the look on you face when you die," they told Susan and Madelynn as the lifted it.

Susan shook in fear, while Madelynn stood calmly. Midnight was closing in. The Death Eaters rose their wands, pointing at Susan, Madelynn, Raylie, and Ryan muttering _Crucio_. Madelynn let a few tears run down her cheek but not daring to yell aloud. Refusing to give them what they wanted. Susan on the other hand, screamed as loud as she could.

Ryan did a mixture of crying and screaming. Raylie screamed bloody murder. Her scream was so high pitched and loud the Death Eaters removed the curse just to plug their ears.

James looked at his siblings. Susan's eyes were filled with fear and hurt. Ryan's eyes showed the same as Susan's. Madelynn was bubbling over with anger. Raylie's crystal eyes were as calm as calm can be. James was taken back by the calmness of Raylie's eyes.

One minute til Halloween. The leading Death Eater raised his wand, pointing directly at Madelynn. "Say goodbye Madelynn."

Madelynn's eyes grew as green light surrounded her. His parent screamed out, crying and pleading for them to stop.

The Death Eater turned on Susan. "Bye Susan," he said in a mocking voice. Just like her sister, she was surrounded by the same green light.

The clock stroke midnight as the Death Eater turned on Ryan. "Say you bye's Ryan." He was surrounded by quietness. The tears had fell when the Death Eater said curse.

Raylie was next. Her blue eyes locked with his as the Death Eater turned to face her. "You get to see you brother and sisters now," Raylie's eyes were calm as the green light filled them. The mischievous glint in them were still there as she fell out of her seat.

A eerie silence followed, as his parents silently cried. The Death Eaters filed out of the room, leaving behind a dark mark symbol.

It felt like an eternity later before the Ministry of Magic showed up. The next few hours consisted of death reports, trying to find out who was dead, and trying to find the bodies.

"Ma'm, who all were killed?" one Ministry personal asked, almost unemotional.

"My three daughter and my son," Mrs. Potter replied.

"What would be there names?" he continued.

"Madelynn Jordan Potter. Susan Faye Potter. Ryan Benjamin Potter. Raylie Brooke Potter," she answered.

"Are you sure," he asked, cocking an eyebrow.

"Why do you ask?" she questioned frighten.

"We only found 3 bodies Ma'm," he replied.

He heard is mum take a deep breath in. "What color eyes do they have?"

The man was taken back by the questioned before walking over to someone, whispering in his ear. He returned seconds later. "Hazel," He confirmed.

"Raylie. Its Raylie missing," she said without a second thought.

"How do you know Ma'm?" he kept questioning.

She handed him a photograph of James, Madelynn, Susan, Ryan, and Raylie. "Look at the eyes. Raylie's eyes are the only ones that are blue."

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Holidays had gone by, uneventful and painful for Lily. She was use to not getting gifts. Her wrist had healed from her latest suicide attempt. All she knew is she wanted out of that living hell as fast as possible.

August was winding down as an owl tapped on her bedroom window. She approached the window cautiously. When the owl offered her his leg, she took the letter attached to it. One the front it read,

_Miss Lily Evans_

_Second room on the left_

_Number 8 Drawly Way_

_Kent, England_

She ripped the seal on the back. Lily saw the words _Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. _She scanned the letter eagerly. She need money and fast.

Lily raced down the street to Severus house, to tell him her news.

"Severus, I'm in. But I don't have any money," she said. She knew that she was a witch and that Severus was a wizard. He told her.

He handed her money, "Come on we're going." They took the city bus to the heart of London. He took her down side roads, and finally into a pub.

"What are we doing here?" she question looking around.

"Hold on," he muttered, he headed over to the pub manager, "Can you open up Diagon Alley for us please?"

The man agreed and within minutes they were in Diagon Alley. He took her to get her supplies, buying everything for her. Only when they were on the bus back home did she talk, "Thanks for this."

"Anytime Lily, anytime," he replied.

She got home, just to search for a trunk to put her stuff in. There was only a week left before she gets to leave her living hell. Lily couldn't be happier.

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James' Hogwarts letter came. After he made it home from his Diagon Alley trip did he realize that Lily was there today. He took very little time packing. He closed his trunk. He fell back on his bed, asleep before his head hit the pillow. He dreamed about getting on the Hogwarts Express.

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A/n- thanks to those of you who reviewed. I did update this before I updated Butterflies. So it will be a while before I update again.

I told you that it was going to get darker than many can expect. I told you in previous chapter's a/n's. I also to people who review last chapter.

There are reason for the deaths of James' sibling main one being that he does have _any_ in the book. And two is that it gives a twist. Raylie's body is missing for a very good reason. It'll come to play in later chapters.

Next chapter Hogwarts Express, and friends.

After that I will only bother with main details of 1-6 years. Please bare with me here. 7th year is gonna be the focal point of this story, but the first 6 chapters are necessary for you to understand. And yes I know they went by pretty fast but that was the whole point.

Well I'm getting off. Can't wait to see what you say about this.

M.M


	5. Living in Fastforward

A/n- thanks for all who reviewed. I am so sorry about the delay on getting this up.

Dis- It's been a few chapters so. I don't own Harry Potter or else Fred wouldn't have died and George wouldn't have lost an ear. James, Sirius and Remus would still be alive now too.

The scars on Lily left wrist were covered up fairly well. She arrived on the platform thanks to Severus with a reasonable amount of time left. She was upset; her sister hated her even more. Since her and Severus saw that she too wanted to go to Hogwarts, Petunia started to hate her even more.

They found a compartment filled with only two people. She didn't notice who was in the compartment, as Severus and herself took the empty seats nearest to the windows. After a conversation about which house she should be in, she finally notice that James was sitting next to her.

She jumped up, pulling Severus with him. "Sorry we have to go," she said quickly, exiting the compartment.

"What was that for Lily?" Severus demanded. She offered no explanation as they found a new compartment. .The rest of the train ride was miserable for her. She hardly listened to Severus' low conversation.

She met three girl in the new compartment. Alice Hall is a brown hair girl with watery light brown eyes. Carissa Armstrong's bronze hair stayed straight and her eyes are a light blue. Dakota Weber is a girl with blue streaked blonde hair and mystifying gray eyes.

She ran to the bathroom when the intercom stated that they were nearing Hogwarts. As she ripped off the hoodie she had been wearing, she grimaced at the scars that reminded her so much of her painful past.

The two worst scaring formed an 'L' looking at it from standing in front of her. She covered it with the robes of Hogwarts, letting the pain slowly, painfully fading from her thoughts.

She was frightened as she got off the scarlet train. She jumped when the booming voice rattled her bones. "Firs' years over here. Firs' years," Hagrid shouted. Dakota, Alice, and Carissa laughed. Lily heard a sound behind her, approaching.

James approached her cautiously, "Lily?"

"Go away, Potter. Haven't you caused enough problems?" Lily asked, her voice hard as steel.

"But Lily-" James started.

"Don't but me Potter. I'm not Lily to you anymore either," Lily said in a low tone, with disgust in her voice. She turned on her heels and walked away, like he did. She knew he was stunned because she didn't feel footsteps behind her.

Dakota whispered to her, "How do you know him?"

She shook her head. Not answering. "Why were you so rude to him," Carissa asked. Carissa was the kind one of the group.

She continued to walk, not answering any questions. They board the boats Hagrid lead them too. Not caring if she was making her friends mad. They didn't need to know her personal life.

Alice noticed they weren't getting anything out of her so she changed the subject to which house they wanted to be in at Hogwarts.

"What house do you-," Alice broke off in mid-sentence. They group of four stared in awe at the magnificent castle that was coming into view.

The boat automatically beached, letting the unexpected first years onto the shore. The rest of the trip to the castle was silent. Most of the first years to in shock to say anything, but there was a group of four boys already chatting it up.

James Potter felt bad about not letting Sirius, Remus, or Peter know anything about his past. But he knew it was for the better.

"There was a red-head girl-" Sirius started.

"Lily," James supplied. Sirius looked at him in shock. "The boy said her name. Remember?"

"Whatever you say, mate?" Sirius said. "But the boy in the compartment said that she should be in Slytherin. I hope I'm not in Slytherin. I'll never be able to live with myself if I'm in Slytherin."

"Yeah, hope for Gryffindor," James added, halfheartedly. The girl he cared most about in life was so close, yet it was like she was millions of kilometers away. She acted as if he didn't exist. Maybe it was better this way, but it still hurt.

The group of new first years stood in front of sorting hat. James wasn't paying attention to the song that it burst out into, but was focused on Lily.

Lily felt someone's eyes on the back of her head but she refused to look aback to see his face again. After months of getting over him, he shows his face. She wouldn't show how much it hurt.

She wouldn't cry anymore over him or them for that fact. She refused. She wouldn't cry until she had her crying shoulder, which would be never.

The names went by in a blur. "Hall, Alice," the professor called. They each gave her an encouraging push as she made her way to the stool. After a few seconds of thinking, the hat yelled out "Gryffindor." Applauds busted out as she happily made it to Gryffindor table.

"Lupin, Remus." He made his way proudly to the stool. The hat was placed on his head and a few seconds later it yelled, "Gryffindor." He hopped off the stool and made his way to Gryffindor table.

"Armstrong, Carissa." Dakota smiled to Carissa and pushed her forward. The hat was placed on Carissa's head, and after a couple seconds, it yelled, "Gryffindor."

"Jenkins, Lee." A boy with a head of lime green hair made his way to the stool. The professor put the hat on his head, and it screamed, "Hufflepuff." He smiled as he bounced to his table.

"Snape, Severus." The hat was placed on his greasy hair, and immediately screamed "Slytherin."

"Evans, Lily." She looked around nervously as she made her way to the stool. She sat on it, looking directly at James first. She closed her eyes, and heard, "Gryffindor." She breathes a sigh of relief and made her way to sit next to Carissa and Alice.

"Black, Sirius." He walked to the stool, like he was everything. He sat down as gracefully as a guy could, and smiled as the hat called out "Gryffindor." It took the room a few seconds to realize that he had been placed in Gryffindor.

"Weber, Dakota." She made her way up there elegantly, and sat down as gracefully as Sirius had. It was apparent that both had been raised in a pureblood family. "Gryffindor." As Lily heard it yell that, she stood and clapped loudly.

"Potter, James." She sat down quickly, and looked the other way. It called out "Gryffindor," and she had no choice but to clap. She didn't bother to pay attention to the rest of the names.

First year went by. James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter all formed the group the 'Marauders.' They managed somehow to each get detentions within the first day of school. By the end of the first year they had the most detentions the school has ever seen.

James had an eye catching 736 detentions. He accompanied Sirius with 586 of his 750 detentions eared. Remus only had to accompany them in 399 detentions he had earned himself. Peter earned 585 but only got to attend James, Sirius and Remus with 278 of his.

James started chasing after Lily that year. By the end of this year he had already asked her out 658. She promptly turned him down every time. He couldn't see why she refused him so much.

Dakota, Alice, and Carissa wondered that as well. They always asked why, but she never given them a reason to her behavior. They gave up on getting the truth out of her that year, but it didn't make it stop for second year.

Lily's summer was hell just like it was before she started attending Hogwarts. Severus once again bought her school supplies when the letter came. 'They' still hated her, now more than ever.

Severus found her on the floor many more times than he should. He picked her up, dusted her off, and taught her how to fight. She didn't end up the floor as often but occasionally she still did. She would lock herself in the bathroom with a razor blade she found last year.

Attempted suicide would come but less often as the summer before. Severus would get angry, and raise his voice. But not like the pervious summer with the 'L' shaped scar on her left wrist.

It was Second year and James still wouldn't get over Lily refusing him. The other Marauder thought it would past, but it didn't and they became worried about his sanity.

The Marauder's often got his mind off of Lily, by trying to find a way to help Remus with is 'Furry little problem.' It hadn't gotten very far but they made a little progress.

Lily stilled felt bad about not letting her friends know why closed up to them. She didn't want her secret hell being spread around the school.

During the summer in between Second and Third years James did nothing but talk about Lily. And his parents didn't realize that it was the girl they had to hurt years ago.

Lily summer was just like the others. Miserable. She decided to forget killing herself. She would only run the razorblade over her wrist when they got too much for her to handle. The feeling of the blood flowing from her body made her feel stronger. She never cut herself enough to leave a mark.

She was surprised that Dakota, Carissa, and Alice haven't found out about her dirty little secret. That summer faded into Third year.

James had immediately started up his asking out since it was the year of Hogsmead trips. He had asked Lily out a total of 1482 before the year ended. It annoyed Lily. She couldn't stop him from asking her out. She just couldn't say yes to him. It would bring back the memories that he left her to wallow in; the happier time. But he would leave again. She knew it.

She went to Hogsmead alone, wear her favorite outfit. It was the only thing left to remind her of the better time without too much pain. A black hoodie James left and a pair of guyish (A/n- my new word. Don't take) shorts.

She would shop for Carissa's, Alice's, and Dakota's Christmas presents. James watched her from a distance, noticing his clothes that she was wearing.

Severus didn't talk to her much but when they did get a chance it was nothing but fighting.

The Marauders had made progress in Moony's 'furry little problem.' They knew what they need to be in order to look after him during his transformations. Animgus was the answer.

Fourth year was just as brutal as the first three. James had decided to keep asking her out. He was now up to a record breaking 2579 times.

She would now keep her mind from wondering. She tried everything, nothing seemed to work.

The Marauders had broken 95 rules of the 100 of Hogwarts. They earned them 5291 detentions altogether. And they lost 657 points over the four years.

The teachers piled up the work, already getting the ready for the O.W.L.'s next year.

O.W.L. year was the hardest one any of the eight have ever experienced at Hogwarts. The homework took hours to get done.

So with the increase of homework, the detentions and asking out decreased slightly. The O.W.L was hard.

Lily was loaded with Prefect duties, homework, and saying no to James. James never gave up.

The Marauder's now accompanied Moony with his furry little problem. James turned into a beautiful Stag with the nickname of Prongs. Sirius changed into a shaggy dog and his nickname of Padfoot. Peter turned into a small mouse with the nickname of Wormtail.

The results of the O.W.L.'s came with their letters. Lily got 10 O's and 1 E. James got 8 O's and 3 E's. Dakota earned the same as Lily. Alice got less. Carissa got all O's. Remus earned the same as Dakota. Peter failed most only passing DADA, Transfiguration, and Charm with and A.

Sixth year had come, and the group was relieved to have the break in between classes. The asking out had almost stopped now, seeming as James was slowly learning. Sixth year was almost as hard as O.W.L year. Lily and Remus had Prefect duties. Homework was just as vast if not more as the previous year

Dakota and Sirius had settled down and Carissa was now with Remus. Alice started to date Frank Longbottom. Lily was forced to spend time with the Marauders. More than she would on her own free will.

But if it made her friends happy, she was fine with it.

The train ride home, her friends forced her to sit in the same compartment as the Marauders, so they could be with their boyfriends before the end of the year.

"Do you want to come over Lily," Dakota asked. All her friends would be staying with Dakota that summer.

Lily looked scared but she wiped it off before anyone could see. "No, I have things to do at home. My parents always have me doing housework." Lily gave her usual response to this question.

"Oh okay," Dakota looked down before Sirius pulled her close. James looked at Lily with a questioning stare before looking away. Lily noticed his glances but said nothing.

Her summer sucked. It was a complete replica of others. More times than not, she was locked in the bathroom, running the razor over her wrist. Watching the blood, letting out the emotions she kept to herself.

She watched out for her letter from Hogwarts, waiting to be able to buy the supplies.

She spotted the owl bring her the letter to her home. She was made Head Girl along with, to her horror, James Potter. She still was able to head off to Diagon Alley to buy her supplies without the help of Severus.

The days went by. Finally it was the day before the scarlet train departed for Hogwarts.

They yelled for her. She groaned auditable before walking down the stairs to her nightmare. "Yes Ma'am?" Lily asked politely.

She saw the fist punch her stomach before she felt it. She doubled over. Before they could attack her again, she moved. She let out her own anger into her punch. She punched him square in the nose.

A few minutes later, she found herself on the floor, gasping for breath. They kicked her in her ribcage for good measure before departing from the kitchen. They were careful not to bruise her face. Like always. She picked herself up after she got her breathing down.

She knew how to hide her bruising better than before. She just hoped no one would ask why she's so sore tomorrow. She locked herself in the second story bathroom. She located her beloved razor blade. Running the razor along her left wrist, she sighed in relief as it bled.

A/n- I warned you last chapter that this or the next would give summaries of the first 6 years and summers. Please tell me how it is. I want to know. For now I think I'm going to go fishing.

Peace out

M.M


	6. New girl

A/N- I know it has been forever since I last posted

A/N- I know it has been forever since I last posted. But my computer crashed. We had to reboot it and I lost all my work. Thankfully before it crashed I saved the last chapters onto a junk drive. With no farther ado the sixth chapter. Enjoy.

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September closed in, faster than Lily expected. She woke on the first, grabbed her trunk and walked out the door. She took out her wand, knowing that the Knight Bus would come for her.

The trip was silent and peacefully as it usually was. She dragged her trunk to the train, looking for Dakota, Carissa, and Alice. She hear a scream, before she saw them.

"LIL," Carissa yelled. She spotted Carissa's bronze hair and made a dash to them. Lily started to hug Carissa, when Alice said, "No fair. Group hug."

They all hugged Lily. "How was your summer?" Dakota attempted at a conversation.

"Please, don't remind me," she asked in a strained voice. Dakota let that subject drop. "Let's get a compartment," Lily suggested. Repicking back up her trunk, the four of them made it onto the large scarlet train.

They searched the train for the four Marauders to sit with. Dakota opened the usual compartment the Marauders sat in. The moment the door opened, they could hear the laughing and joking of the four boys. Three Marauders head popped up with the opening of the compartment door. Peter was nowhere to be found. Instead Frank took his spot.

Remus looked very pale and tired, even though he was still messing around with the others. Remus moved over enough for Carissa to take a seat by him. He put an arm around her waist.

Sirius was lively and happy as ever, as Dakota took her place next to him. He smiled at her. Frank smiled as Alice took a seat to the right of him. She intertwined her fingers in his.

Lily sat in between wall and Alice. The conversations began, with laughing and fooling around as well.

Remus looked at his watch. "Hey, Lily, James. Prefect meetings." Lily stood up with Remus, heading for the door. James followed suit, silently.

Lily talked to the new prefects. James handed out the times and dates. "Okay, Lupin and Brown, you have first shift. After your thirty minutes are up, you go get Hale and Swan. Any questions?"

No hands raised. Lily smiled as James said loudly, "You are dismissed."

Remus and Tara walked towards each other. "How are you?" Remus asked politely.

Tara muttered, "Fine." She looked down at her feet. "So how are we going work this?" She looked up after a moment.

"You take one way I'll take the other and we'll met back here at the end," Remus stated. Tara nodded. "Do you want head of the train or back?"

"I'll take back."

"Okay, We'll met back here after we make rounds." Remus head out the door.

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A tiny girl pulled a trunk bigger than her towards the scarlet train. Her hair the color of raven wearing a sky blue sundress. A blue ribbon tied her hair from her face. Her eyes looked calm as she boarded more towards the head of the train.

It was almost time for the train to head towards Hogwarts. She couldn't find a compartment to sit in. She silently walked down the walkway, looking for a compartment. A slim, wore out boy approached her.

"Do you need help?" Remus asked the small girl in front of him. She met his chocolate eyes with her icy topaz ones. The glare was intense.

She broke her stare, looking to the left, "I'm looking for my brother and his girlfriend. I haven't seen them in a while."

Remus smiled at the young girl. "What's your brothers and the girls name?"

"James," she stated promptly.

"James what?" Remus pressed. When she said James he immediately thought of his friends, but James never said anything about a younger sister. And has he ever seen her when he spend a couple of weeks at the Potter house.

"James Potter silly," she laughed.

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A/n- I am mean because this is where I'm leaving you. Please tell me what you think. And also who do you think is this new girl?

Well for now I'm soaring outta here

M.M


	7. Secrets

A/n- Well I wrote this the same time I wrote the other chapter

A/n- Well I wrote this the same time I wrote the other chapter. I was just mean because I wanted to know who you thought the mystery girl was.

I have one review to reply to, but I can't do that because they didn't have anything to let me reply to. So instead I'm gonna reply on here.

To Jen: First and foremost I am going to tell you, I'm not the best writer in the world. I try my best. I never promised to bee good at grammar or spelling for that fact. It's just the way I write. I don't like using betas unless it's my cousin, but he is currently very busy with the school drawing to an end. Also, I am very glad you like my plot. I've had this in my head for a while. I'm sorry that my work isn't up to your standers. Thanks for your review anyways.

"But James Potter doesn't have any siblings," said Remus quietly.

"Yes he does," she said angrily.

"What's your name?" asked Remus.

"Raylie Potter," she said, meeting his eyes once more. "Do you know where my brother and his girlfriend are?"

"Here follow me," Remus levitated her trunk. He led her to the prefect compartment first. "Here wait one moment."

Tara was waiting for him inside. "Tara, can you go get Rebecca and Drew for me. I have to help a first year. I owe you one."

He levitated her trunk once more, headed for his compartment. He dropped the trunk. "Sit here Raylie; I'll be back out in a few minutes."

He opened the compartment door, entering. "James, why didn't you tell us you had a sister?"

The conversations stopped. "Because I don't," James said.

"Yes you do. She's right outside the compartment now, looking for you and from what she said your girlfriend," said Remus.

"What does she look like?" asked James.

"Curly black hair in a ponytail with a blue ribbon tied around it," Remus described.

"No, no, no. What color are her eyes?" James said irritated.

"An icy topaz color, why?" replied Remus.

"Get her away from me," said James. "Just get her away from here." He started muttering to himself, "She's dead. She's dead."

Everyone stared at him like he lost his mind. "Why?" Lily spoke.

"She's dead," he shook his head.

"Well, there is a girl out there, claiming to be your sister. You need to talk to her," Remus replied, sitting down next to Carissa.

He exited the compartment, talking quietly to the first year standing outside the compartment. After a few minutes, he came back in. "Remus, can you find her a compartment with other first years," muttered James.

Remus obligated. "Go with my friend Remus," James told Raylie.

Everyone sat in silence until Remus got back. "What the hell was that?" Remus demanded.

"Met in the Head Common Room after dinner," James brushed off the question.

The Great Hall was filled in as the stool and hat was place at the front of the room. The first years filed in. Professor McGonagall rolled out the list.

The sorting hat burst into song, which none of the group listened to. It all went by in a blur.

"Potter, Raylie," called McGonagall.

Raylie sat on the stool, as the hall was whispering.

"James never said he had a sister."

"I know she's hot," a second year Ravenclaw boy answered the girl to his left.

"James has a sister?"

Professor Dumbledore raised his hand and they fell silent.

"I think you'll be best in-"

A/n- I know Fire of Thine Eye, cliff hanger. Be warned that I don't have internet, so I can't check out what I wrote for my previous chapters. Bear with me here. Please do tell me if I got something wrong, I will go change it for ya'll.

But keep dreaming big.

M.M


	8. Pain and hurt

A/n- I know that I have lost a lot of my old reviewers because of my delay

A/n- I know that I have lost a lot of my old reviewers because of my delay. So I'm starting to write a couple chapters at a time for ya'll. I am terrible sorry if I write something wrong or have errors. I haven't promised to be the best writer in the world, so please bare with me as I try to get things flowing again.

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"Hufflepuff," the hat screeched. They sat in silence as Raylie Potter took a seat at the Hufflepuff table. Raylie's eyes, calm as usual, stared at the wooden table, in thought.

Finally, the last person was called. "Zahr, Igor," Professor McGonagall said, her voice loud and strong. She placed the hat upon his head.

The hat pondered for a moment before yelling out, "Ravenclaw."

Igor took his seat. Dumbledore stood, as silence washed over the hall. "First and foremost, welcome new students and welcome back returning students. For the first year, and Marauders, the Forbidden Forest is in fact forbidden. Please don't loose your house any points because of it. Secondly, I would like to introduce the new Head boy and girl for this year. For the first time in years, they have been selected from the same house. James Potter and Lily Evans," applauding came after this, and some wolf whistles as well.

"That shall be all. Your stomachs are full, and your eyes are tired. Time to tuck in," Dumbledore took his seat, as the Prefects, minus Remus, lead their house to the common rooms.

The Marauders took the girls a short cut to the heads common room. They weren't really seeing the spectacular head common room. James took a seat across from Lily, and the other took various seats around the room.

"What the hell was that?" Sirius demanded.

James didn't look at Sirius as he spoke, "Truths must be revealed."

Carissa gave him a 'have you lost your mind recently?' look. Lily looked at James, "What happened, Jay?"

Everyone looked at them, shocked at Lily's nickname. "You wanna know the real reason behind my moving? Voldemort. He wanted my parents to join him; when they refused, he started hunting them down. Mum and Dad didn't want you or any other muggle to be harmed because of their response to his questioned. I told them I didn't want to move at first."

"They gave me the option of watching you die, or hurting you but knowing you were alive. I rather know you were alive than to watch you die. Everything was wrong. Madelynn was in her third year, and Susan just starting. The annual Hogsmead trip for Halloween was approaching. Somehow, Madelynn managed to get Susan into Hogsmead without anyone noticing. It started to go wrong when two Death Eaters put them under the Imperius Curse."

"They never went back to Hogwarts. They forced Susan to tell where we lived. They showed up 5 minutes to midnight, night before Halloween. I heard commotion down stairs, I grabbed my invisibility cloak I had taken from dads room few hours earlier. I tossed it around my shoulders."

"Within two minutes the had everyone, but me, gathered in the living room. The Death Eaters force mum and dad to watch as they torture each of them with Cruciatus curse. Madelynn refused to cry. Susan and Ryan were silently crying. Raylie, eyes calm, gave the most blood turning scream I ever heard."

"The Death Eaters mocked them as they killed them. Four times green light flashed in that living room. Their eyes all fearful. When they got to Raylie, they pointed the wand at her. Her calm, icy eyes met mine and she smiled, her eyes turned into a glint of happiness. They immediately turn calm again, as the last and final time the green light flash. It engulfed her. A voice broke the silence by saying, 'You should've joined when you had the chance.'"

"It felt like forever until the Ministry of Magic showed up. We knew something was wrong when one person asked, 'Are you sure that there are four bodies?'. Mum looked down at me, before asking, 'What color are their eyes?'. When they reported hazel, my heart dropped. They had not only killed Raylie but took her body with them."

James stared at Lily the whole time, not caring what the others said. "The Death Eaters gave Ryan and Raylie the worst birthday present ever, death. Midnight was when they killed Ryan and Raylie. They turned three seconds before they died."

"That and moving was the hardest things I ever did. They both killed me-," James started.

"And you don't think that your moving killed _me_?" Lily asked. "You don't know how much it hurt me when you moved. You broke _me_. You knew how they treated me, you knew. You don't know how many times I ended up on that kitchen floor, in the year I waited to go to Hogwarts. I don't have enough patience to sit here and count. Around September, I fell into a deep depression."

"Almost daily, I got hit around. Punched, kicked, screamed at, used as a punching bag. I wanted out, and fast. Three major times I tried, failing every time, but only just. You always wondered about my friendship with Severus? Well if it wasn't for him I wouldn't be here today. Hanging myself from my ceiling fan, I was close to losing consciousness. I had only enough to realize that Severus cut me down."

"The second major time was when I found a sharp metallic object. I slipped into the bathroom and slowly ran it down the right side of my left wrist. It was about an inch deep and 15 inches long. I lost consciousness when Severus started cleaning up my wound. During either of the two major time, he never questioned why I was doing it. He never yelled, not even once."

"That all changed the last and final time I tried to commit suicide. With that same object I found a few weeks earlier, I ran it, quickly, across at the beginning of the first scar. If Severus would have gotten there seconds later, I would have successfully committed suicide. I was in the hospital for a couple days after that."

"He came and started firing off questions I couldn't answer. He asked 'What the hell was I thinking?'. The next question threw me off. He processed to ask, 'What would he say if he say you do that? What would he do?'. That was the only time that Severus ever raised his voice to me, at least before Hogwarts," Lily said taking off the black coat. She showed the scar on her left wrist, forming an 'L'.

Tears started running down Lily's face as memories flashed in her mind. Lily collapsed on the floor, in tears. James sat down cross legged, pulling Lily into his lap. Comforting her like he use to do. He stroked her hair, as he rocked back and forth. "I'm gonna kill them. Their dead."

James started singing,

"When I see your smile, tears roll down my face.

I can't replace and now that I'm strong I have figured out

How this world turns cold and it breaks my soul.

And I know I'll find deep inside me, I can be the one

I will never let you fall

I'll stand up with you forever

I'll be there for you through it all

Even if saving you sends me to heaven

Its okay, its okay, its okay

Seasons are changing and waves are crashing

And stars are falling all for us

Days grow longer and night grow shorter

I can show you I'll be the one

I will never let you fall

I'll stand up with you forever

I'll be there for you through it all

Even if saving you sends me to heaven

Cause you're my,

You're my, my, my true love

My whole heart, please don't throw that away

Cause I'm there for you

Please don't walk away, please tell me you'll stay

Ohh Stay more,

Use me as you will

Pull my strings just for a thrill

And I know that I'll be okay

Though my skies are turning gray,"

He stopped singing as Lily fall asleep. Everyone looked at him, questioningly. He shrugged his shoulders as he stood with Lily cradled in his arm, bridal style. He placed her on the couch and sat down on the other.

"What do you want to know?"

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A/n- the song isn't mine. It belongs to Red Jumpsuit Apparatus. The song is called your guardian angel. When I first listened to it, I thought of this scene. Its good to finally have sit posted. More twist and turns later. But for now its late, and I better go to sleep.

Hope ya'll are happy with the house I put Raylie in. I just can't wait to get to Christmas break. That will be fun to write about.

But for now. I'm riding low.

M.M


	9. Lies

A/n- okay, don't get mad at me. I wrote this chapter a while ago, on my cousins laptop. But something happened and his compy crashed. So like when ours crashed, he had to reinstall everything and everything was lost, including this chappy.

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They sat there in silence. James' eyes flickered from Lily to the others frequently. Lily's chest was raising up and down quite evenly. 

"Was this the reason that Lily hated you?" Alice finally spoke. 

James let out a sigh and shrugged, "I guess. That's something you should ask Lily."

"Why didn't you tell us, mate?" Sirius asked. 

"It really doesn't matter to much. Just because we were friends doesn't matter now," his eyes remained on Lily's sleeping form.

"How did you put her to sleep?" asked Carissa.

"I know how to calm her down," he answered. He replied to every question they asked, but he saw Lily stirring. He smiled as she sat up. "Finally, its up," he joked. 

She rolled her eyes. "How long have I been out?" she asked groggily. 

"An hour, maybe and hour and a half. Not as long as other times," he shrugged. 

"How long were you planning to keep this from us?" Dakota demanded in a murderous tone. 

"Not this long," Lily answered.

"Why didn't you tell us? I thought we could tell each other everything," Carissa asked, hurt in her voice.

"I really don't know," Lily looked away from Dakota to met Carissa's eyes. 

"Don't give me that bull," Alice answered for Carissa. "You did it, you know why you did it. Just tell us why."

"I can't stand it when someone looks at me with sympathy. I didn't want you to look at me like that. I knew I would get those looks. Even if you don't mean it, the looks still on your face and I can't stand it. I didn't want," Lily repeated.

"How can you think that?" Dakota demanded, once again.

"Because I know it would happen, even if you don't think you're doing it, you still are," Lily said, in a strained voice. 

"James is giving you a sympathetic look, and you don't mind it," Remus pointed out. 

"He's always given me that look, ever since he knew about them," Lily said. 

"Why does Severus get to know and you couldn't even tell you best friends?" Carissa asked.

"Severus can't tell anyone, even if he wanted to," Lily said, with satisfaction. When she noticed their questioning looks, "An unbreakable vow we made. If he tells, he would die. I didn't even want him knowing. He stumbled in on 'family time'."

"So you trust him more than you trust your best friends?" Alice said, a disbelieve smirk. Her head shook a little.

"No, its not like that," Lily cried, in frustration.

"Than when you figure out what its like, you tell me," Dakota said, hurrying out the common room.

Alice made a quick movement. She was standing within seconds, muttering, "Yeah, tell me too, but not until you do."

Carissa followed wordlessly. She let them go. She stood, "I'm going to bed. I'll see you in the morning."

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When she woke the next morning, she felt like she was dreaming. She dressed and grabbed her bag, still in her dreamy state. She walked into the common room, expecting to see Carissa, Dakota, and Alice waiting for her like they normally would, but they were nowhere in sight. 

James stood there instead, "Good morning, Lie."

"Morning," she muttered. Everything felt as if they belonged in a dream.

They headed down to the Great Hall. Her eyes swept it, mentally looking for the others. James lead her to where their group of friends were. She laughed at James' word as she sat. Everyone stared at the pair. Lily felt a different pair of eyes on them. 

She looked up to see the headmaster smiling at her. She returned the smile to see a glint of happiness there. She knew that he knew everything. She took her seat and stared at her silent friends. 

Throughout the entire breakfast, her friends refused to speak or make any eyes contact. She knew that she deserved that and much more but she was still angry.

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The first day was just as bad as breakfast. By the end of the day her friends still didn't make eye contact or said a word to her. She had piles of homework and it was only the first day back. 

Everyone met up in the head common room, since it was quieter than the Gryffindor common room. After minutes of her friends acts she burst out with, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you, okay?"

They looked up at her outburst. "I'm sorry that I didn't tell you sooner for that fact. I never meant it to go this far. I never meant for anything to happen," she pleaded. 

They stood up, engulfing her in a tight group hug. "Ouch, guys. Not the stomach."

They quickly jumped back. James stood, "What?" 

"Bruises, that's all. Everything else is healed, I promise," She looked for his approval. 

They shook their heads and James said, "When?"

She shrugged. "Night before coming back," she answered. "It's nothing I can't handle. I mean, when I turn 17, I will hex them to hell and back but until then I can handle it. Its only during summers and when January 1st comes I don't have to go back."

James seemed to be satisfied with her answer. "My place is always open. Mum and dad would be happy to see you again."

She smiled. "Not until I turn 17."

"Let me see the bruises," Alice demanded. 

Lily lifted her blouse, showing everyone the purple, blue, black, green, and yellow bruises that covered her stomach. "Nothing worst than normal," she promised, as she let her shirt down.

Dakota looked at her before stepping closer, "Can I feel?"

"Don't push too hard. It hurts," Lily answered.

Dakota lightly pressed her first and second fingers to Lily's ribcages. She felt around lightly as she could. "It's more than bruises. You have a few out of place ribs and one is broke," she informed a few minutes later. 

Lily shrugged. She looked at James, rolling her eyes, "I'm going. I'm going. Geez." 

Dakota walked with Lily to the Hospital wing. 

The nurse looked at Lily and lead them over to a bed. "What's the problem?"

"She has a few out of place ribs and one is broke," Dakota informed again, sounding a lot like a nurse herself. 

Dakota knew about a lot of thing that involved healing because her mum was a healer at St. Mungo's. 

The healer returned a few minutes later with a potion. She handed it to Lily and said, "When you finish this, you may go."

Lily downed the foul tasting potion in a huge gulp. She sat for a few more minutes before Dakota helped her up. 

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A/n- I know that I got Lily's birthday wrong but that's something for later on in the story. :.

Hope you liked. And is anyone out there that likes Twilight? And have anyone else read Breaking Dawn? 

M.M


	10. Black to blue

Dis- I don't own anything but Carissa, Dakota, and Raylie.

A/n- okay one of my readers, NANLIT, brought to my attention that Raylie was 9 turning 10. To make it clear Raylie is 10 at the beginning of 7th year, she's turning 11 on Halloween. I'm sorry for my indifference between the chapters.

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Quiet frankly, James was getting sick of the threats of towards Lily. James rarely left Lily's side since they become friends. When he did, girls trampled him, saying that Lily had no right to do what she was doing.

"Look, Lily can do what she pleases. I can't stop her nor will I. If you don't stop threatening her, you wont know what hit you," he answered every time. Once he said that, every girl disappeared, muttering darkly.

He sat by Lily during dinner that night, refusing to let her leave without him. He turned his back to talk with Remus and Sirius about Friday. Two girls sat next to Lily.

"You know that its wrong, what you're doing to James," the first one spoke.

"Yeah, acting like you're his friend all of a sudden. You shouldn't play his emotions like that," the other nodded.

"If you don't stop, we'll stop you," the first one said.

"How many times do I have to repeat this? If you don't stop threatening her, you wont know what hit you," James said, loud enough for the whole hall to hear.

Everyone silenced as they stared at James. The headmaster stared at James with a slight smile.

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Days had passed, Raylie watched James from a distance. It was late afternoon, about a month after school had started. She walked up to James, who surprisingly alone.

"James," she sang in a high pitch voice.

He shook slightly before turning around to face her, "Raylie?"

"Why do you hesitate?" Raylie asked.

"Because I watched you die," he said simply.

"You only think I died. Somehow I managed to escape before they hit me," she shrugged.

"Than where have you been since then?" James challenged her.

"Somewhere in the states. A nice couple took me there," she replied. "After a while they came back, that's when I got my letter."

He engulfed her in a tight hug. "I missed you so much."

Her eyes flickered black, "As have I."

When he pulled her back to look her in the eyes, they flickered from black to crystal blue.

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A/n- not as long as last nights but still an update. Next chapter is truth and dare. Fun fun. Lol. Might update again tonight.

M.M


	11. First Kiss

A/n- hehe I told you I would update again tonight. Okay, truth and dare.

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"Okay, I'm bored," whined Sirius. They were sitting in the middle of heads common room.

"What do you want to do then?" Remus asked, irritated.

"Lets play truth and dare then," Carissa said.

"We're not playing it in here," James answered.

"Gryffindor common room then," Dakota said, getting up. The group headed towards the Gryffindor common room. Everyone was messing around, pushing into each other. They were laughing and fooling around. James picked up Lily and flipped her upside down.

"Put me down," she laughed.

When everyone enter the common room, Lily was still flipped, Remus was pushed by Dakota, and Carissa was breathless as Sirius tickled her.

Most of the common room, which was 6th and 7th years, stared at the group. Sirius asked loudly, "Truth or dare, anyone?"

A racket filled the common room. "If you're playing, form a circle in the middle of the room. If you're not, I ask you not to yell," Dakota yelled out.

Twenty-two people sat in a circle, including Lily, James, Sirius, Remus, Carissa, Dakota, Frank, and Alice. "The rules," James started. He passed around a bottle. "If you don't want to do the dare you are given, you're out. If you decide you don't want to answer the truth, truthfully, then you may ask for a dare instead."

The bottle went around the circle before someone asked, "Whose going first?"

"Carissa because she wanted to play it," Sirius raised his eyebrow suggestively.

"Michael," Carissa addressed a 6th year. He nodded. "Truth or dare."

"Truth," he said confidently.

Carissa thought momentarily before asking, "Who was your first kiss?"

"Felicia White," he answered, not caring what others thought. "James Potter?"

"Dare," he said without hesitation.

"Show up tomorrow for breakfast in your boxers, and ask McGonagall if she likes them."

"Okay?" he said wirily.

The game went on for hours. Finally around 1, only James, Brooke, Lily, Carissa, Dakota, Sirius, Killian and Remus remained.

"James?" Brooke asked.

"Truth," James said after answering to all the dares.

"Where was your first kiss?" she asked quietly.

James' eyes laid on Lily as he answered, "Middle of a forest, next to a lake, in the pouring rain, when I was ten."

"Killian?" James requested.

"Truth," she answered, not wanting James to give her a crazy dare.

"Aw I wanted to dare you. Anyways, why don't do dare?"

"Because you're a Marauder and I don't want your dare," she answered. "Lily?"

"Dare."

"I dare you to kiss Carissa," Killian said with a evil grin on her face.

Lily lend a little over, kissing Carissa's cheek. "That isn't what I meant," Killian complained.

"You never said that," Lily argued. "Dakota?"

"Dare," she said boardly.

"I dare you to leave the circle."

"Mean," Dakota complained. Dakota got up leaving her, James, Brooke, Killian, Remus, and Sirius.

"Sirius," Lily said again.

"Truth," he answered, fearfully.

"Who do you like?" Lily asked, a evil grinned flashed across her face.

Sirius groaned, "Dakota."

Sirius looked at James, "Truth or dare?"

"Truth," James answered again. "Never mind. I'm out of here." James walked out. A streak of lightening flashed across the sky, lighting the entire room.

Lily wasn't paying attention to the rest of the game. She was staring out the window. A hand waved in front of her. She shook her head.

"Finally she's responsive. Isn't that your owl?" Remus asked.

"Yeah, but why would she be here at this ti-" Lily stopped dead.

In untidy writing were the words, 'Thunderstorm. You know where to find me.'

She smiled and handed it to Remus, "I'm going."

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"That's why you left?" She said a few minutes later.

He didn't answer. He held out his hand, which she took. He spun her around in middle of the rain.

"Bringing back memories?" Lily asked.

"Too many. What happened to us?" James answered.

"Voldemort, and his plans of death, I guess," Lily replied softly. He spun her quietly.

"I'm sorry that I did that. I didn't want it to be like that," James said softly.

"Me either. I was hurt and didn't want to face the fact that I was in love with someone who hurt me," Lily let out.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I got over it," Lily looked up into his hazel eyes as another streak of lightening flashed. They were so livid with love.

"Everyone of Gryffindor is watching," James muttered.

"They followed me. Remus, Sirius, Carissa, Dakota, Alice, under the cloak," Lily muttered.

"More watching, the better," James spun her again. Every inch of their clothing clinging to their body, soaked with water.

"I love you now, as I loved you when we were 10," Lily said to him quietly as he pulled her into him.

"I love you, so much," James said. A thunder crash as he told her.

A streak of lightening lit the sky as they kissed. They heard their friends cheer, and knew that the Gryffindors were just as happy.

"Let's get back in before we get sick," James pulled her along.

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"Miss Evans, Mr. Potter, what is it for you to be out of bed at this hour?" the headmaster asked as they entered the fourth floor corridor .

"I-I-I-" Lily tried.

"I didn't see anything," Dumbledore said with a sparkle in his eyes. "But you'd better hurry along before someone else catches you."

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A/n- what'd you think. Just so you know, it was basically a reenactment of their first kiss. :

You should eat Oreos and be happy :

M.M

(I think you should be able to review without any help this time)


	12. Boxers

A/n- yay I'm updating now!!

Sorry for the delay. If you want to know why, read the newest chapter of butterflies. 

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When they entered the Gryffindor common room, they heard a uproar of cheers. The common room opened behind them again. Dakota, Carissa, Alice, Remus, and Sirius entered. 

"Can someone dry us please?" Sirius yelled over the commotion. Seconds later they glowed red and then back to normal. "Thanks."

Lily's hand was securely in James'. Brooke looked at James and Lily and asked, "Truth or dare?"

James looked at Lily and answered, "Truth."

"Who was your first kiss?"

"Lily Tabitha Evans," James answered. 

"Lily?" Brooke questioned. 

"Truth," she said confidently.

"Your first kiss?" Brooke asked again.

"James Mason Potter," Lily looked at James and he kissed her in front of everyone. 

"Go out with me again?" James asked her when they broke apart. 

"Of course," Lily answered. 

A couple of sixth and seventh year girls busted out in tears, and ran up to their dorms. 

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The group head to the Head's common room to have a sleepover. The guys flicked their wands and the furniture disappear, being replaced with 8 cots. The 8 cots formed a semi circle around the fireplace. 

James and Lily conjured their blankets and pillows from their rooms and pushed their cots together. James looked at the cots and transformed it into one bed. 

"Oi, what you think your doing?" Alice asked. 

"Getting ready to go to bed," Lily rolled her eyes.

"Not like that," Carissa agreed. 

It was James' turn to roll his eyes. "Yes we are," he answered. "Nothing's gonna happen."

Sirius eyebrows rose and stared at them. "How can we be certain of that?"

"You guys forget that I lived at his house. His parents even let me sleep in his room most of the times. We've slept in the same bed before," Lily explained. She laid down on her and James' bed and flicked her wand, conjuring up five other blankets and quiet a few pillows. 

James laid down, pulling Lily closer. She placed her head in the crock of his shoulder. Everyone watched as they talked. "You missed Raylie didn't you?"

"As much as I missed you. He was taking everything from me. First you, then Raylie, and the others. After that mum and dad lost it. They fought daily and blamed their selves for Raylie, Ryan, Madeline, and Susan's death. I hardly knew them," James said.

"Only when Sirius moved in did I get back the parents I knew before the murders," James added as a second thought.

"I'm sorry," Lily said. 

"It's not your fault. It's no body but His for killing some many people," James said. 

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Everybody woke up the next morning. Everyone but James got dressed. They grabbed their book bags and headed towards the Great Hall. 

The whole Hall stared at them as James walked up, holding Lily's hand wearing nothing but his boxers. They were green plaid. They sat down near the teachers table and a few minutes after sitting, Professor McGonagall came up to James. 

"Mr. Potter why are you in you boxers?" She asked. 

"What do you like them?" James replied. 

"Get dressed," Professor McGonagall rolled her eyes and walked away. James waved his wand and his school uniform was on. 

The group and Michael we're laughing so hard they started crying. "I'm surprised she didn't give you detention," Remus noted.

"Me too," James agreed.

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A/n- well sorry for leaving you like this, but I'm tired and headed to bed. Hopefully I'll be update soon. 

1) READ

2) READ THE STEPS

3) PRESS THE BUTTON ON THE BOTTOM LEFT HAND CORNER

4) WRITE SOMETHING TO TELL ME HOW I'M DOING. ANYTHING YOU WANT

5) PRESS THE BUTTON THE GOES ACROSS THE BOTTOM THAT SAYS REVIEW

6) CLOSE WINDOW

7) PAT YOUR SELF ON THE BACK AND GET YOUR SELF SOMETHING GOOD TO SNACK ON 

CONGRATS YOU SENT ME A REVIEW

I'm hoping the caps will get your attention.

M.M


	13. Bonds grow stronger

A/n- I hope this doesn't turn out underlined. I can't fix the others. So I'm sorry. Anyways I'm sorry I haven't been updating. School started again.

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Classes drug on. James and Lily were the center of all gossip. James' fan club was crushed that he was with someone beside one of them. Lily was looked at with hatred and envy.

Lily looked at James and said, "I have to go to the Hospital Wing."

He took her hand and walked beside her as they headed there. "A check-up?"

"Yes, there not hurting as bad it did before. I can breath with out too much pain," Lily answered.

The rest of the trip was silent. "Ah, Ms. Evans, back for a check-up?" The nurse said.

Lily let go of James' hand and followed the healer to a bed. "Lets see how those ribs have been healing," she said.

Lily let the healer press slightly to her ribs. She groaned as the healer pressed on the broken one. "It seems the broken one isn't healing as well as it should be. You're going to need more potions to help it help right," she disappeared and reappeared with a potion. "Drink this, then hurry to bed. Its going to put you out."

She gulped it, and James walked over to help her up. They got out the door and Lily slumped down. James picked her up bridal style and carried her back to the Head common room.

Carissa entered with Dakota. "What's with her?"

"Her rib isn't healing like usual so the Healer gave her a potion to help heal it, but unfortunately it put her to sleep," James explained. "What are you doing here anyways?"

"Her owl came today," Dakota held out a envelope. "We were coming to give it to her."

"Put it here, she should be up soon," James motioned to the table next to the couch. "Who's it from?"

"Its from her parents," Carissa answered. Dakota placed the envelope on the side table. James covered Lily with a blanket. They walked out, leaving Lily with the letter from her parents.

"She only has a month left before she goes back," James said heavily.

"Is there anyway we can get her to go to your house, James?" Dakota asked.

"Lily's a fighter. She wont go without a fight. A fight she doesn't need to fight," James answered.

James bumped into someone, "I'm sorr-"

"James," a high pitched voice squealed.

"Oh hey, Raylie. How's my little sister doing?" James asked, kneeing down to her level.

"I'm fine. I was looking for you actually," Raylie answered.

"And why would you being looking for me?" James asked messing with her thick black curls.

"What are we going to do about Christmas?" Raylie asked. "I mean its only a month away."

"I haven't talked to mum and dad yet, but I don't think you can come to our house just yet. Mum and dad isn't ready for that step yet," James said heavily.

Raylie looked at James with sad eyes, "I understand. I wish it could be some other way." Her mood changed. "What are you planning to get me?" she asked excited.

"That's for me to know and you to find out in a month," James said, touching Raylie's nose lightly.

She giggled, and replied, "Okays." She bounced away.

"You would have made a great big brother," Carissa noted.

"I was only doing what Susan and Madelynn did for me. They made great big sisters. I could tell them anything," James said, walking off.

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Mistletoes filled the whole castle as Christmas drew closer. James hadn't pressured Lily into telling him what her parents decided to tell her this time.

The group were sitting down at the breakfast the morning of departure. James noticed Lily's excitement wasn't there. "What's wrong, Lie? You don't want to go home?"

"Its not that I don't want to go home. Its more like I don't want to get off the train. My uncle Keith and my cousin Landon are picking me up from the station."

Raylie came from the Hufflepuff table and sat on James lap. "Are you staying here for the holidays?" James asked the small first year.

"Yes. I'm gonna miss you," Raylie put her arms around James' neck. James pulled her into a tight hug. Raylie giggled and got up from his lap.

"Lily," Raylie sat on her lap.

"Yes, Raylie?" Lily asked.

"Here, don't open until Christmas though," Raylie placed a box in Lily's hand. Lily pulled the small child into a hug then let go. Raylie bounced back to the Hufflepuff table, and to her friends.

"Ready," James asked the group.

"Its now or never," Lily replied, grabbing his hand.

The train ride was full of fun and games. Hours went by as if nothing was going to happen.

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A/n- up next is what happens when James and Lily met her uncle and cousin.

Preview:

"_Get away from her," Landon said dangerous._

"_Don't tell him what to do, Landon," Lily answered, kissing James again._

"_Oi, what did I just tell you?" Landon said again._

"_I'll do what I want," Lily stated._

"_Your parents were right, you're just a slutty mistake," Her uncle spat_


	14. Family fights

A/n- new chapter time. Hope you enjoy.

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The scarlet train came to a halt in the train station. Lily nervously grabbed her trunk and walked off the train with James next to her. Their friends stepped off the train behind them.

They stood around as most walked by them, some stopped and said their goodbyes and others walked on with dirty looks. James pulled on Lily's hand, urging her to wall through the barrier between Platform 9 ¾ and the muggle world.

She forced a smile as they opened their eyes to the muggle world. They moved to the side to let the others out.

"What are you planning to do?" Lily asked James and Sirius. She noticed his parents over to the left.

James looked behind him and said, "Mum and dad would love to see you again."

"Maybe another time," Lily said.

"If that's what you want," James shrugged. Lily nodded.

"Are you sure you're gonna be fine at home?" Sirius asked. "I could always steal you away from there and give you to James."

Lily giggled and answered, "Yes, I'll be fine. Oh, James, I will be at your house either the day of my birthday or the day after."

"You know where we live?" James asked.

"867 London way, Wales," Remus recited. Everyone laughed and Remus asked, "What?"

"Its sad that you know James' address by heart," Carissa flipped her hair.

Lily looked around and noticed her cousin Landon approaching them. She groaned.

"What's the matter?" Sirius asked.

"Their here," she said heavily. "I wished I didn't have to deal with them."

"Then don't," Dakota muttered.

"I have to. My sisters getting married," Lily answered.

"Lily, its good to see you again," Landon smiled.

"Hold on, and let me say goodbye to my friends then we can go," Lily said without looking at them. "Take care," she muttered every time she hugged each of them.

"I'll see you soon," Remus answered in her ear.

She smiled at James, who was leaning on a pillar. He pulled her into a hug, holding her close as he spun her. He stopped where her back was against the pillar. His lips covered hers as they kissed. Landon looked furious as he pulled on James' shoulder, attempting to pull him away. "Get away from her, you freak" Landon said dangerous.

She pulled away to answer, "Don't tell him what to do, Landon." kissing James again.

"Oi, what did I just tell you?" Landon said again.

"I'll do what I want," Lily stated. James pulled himself from Lily's grip, and whispered huskily in her ear, "I love you."

He walked over to their friends, about to walk away. "Bye Lily," they agreed. They turned their backs to them, walking away.

"Your parents were right, you're just a slutty mistake," Her uncle spat. James turned away so fast his eyes hurt.

He was just about to remark when Lily asked in a dangerous voice, "What did you call me?"

"He called you a slutty mistake," Landon answered.

James noticed the others turned around to see Lily's reaction. Lily's eyes flashed with pure hatred. She grabbed her uncles throat and pinned him to the pillar. "There's a lot of things you have wrong. For one, I'm no mistake. Another one, I'm not a slut. I have enough for them calling me a mistake, I'm not going to take you calling me a mistake," Lily said murderously, pushing him up the pillar a little more with each word.

"Do you understand me," Lily asked slamming her uncle against the pillar. He nodded, and Lily pressed her lips against his ear and murmured, "I don't hear you."

"Yes," he answered breathlessly. She lifted her hand and watched him drop to the ground, breathing heavily.

Landon walked up to her and said, "Who the hell do you think you are?"

"Me," Lily answered.

Landon's hand came down hard across her face, leaving a red mark there. Lily fell to the ground.

Everyone gasped, and James was going for Landon but Lily got up from the ground. They watched as she warned him, "You're about to wish you never did that."

Landon's hand raised and in a flash Lily's hand grasped his and flipped him on his stomach. He stood up and she knocked his feet from under him. He tried to stand but Lily stomped on his stomach. He threw her foot off of him, leaving her unbalanced. He clenched his hand into a fist. He aimed a punch at her stomach.

Lily was faster than him. She quickly grabbed his hand with her left and punched him in his stomach with her right. He bend over slightly and Lily's fist made contact with his nose. He straightened and she kneed him in his groin. He fell to the ground. She made another fist as he uncle approached. She punched him in his face without a second glance and walked over to James.

"Are you sure you don't want to come to my house?" James asked.

"I can handle it," Lily muttered. "Now get out of here. I'll see you soon."

"If that's what you want," James answered. He kissed her softly and turned around, "Be safe."

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A/n- Okay this plays out in a later chapter. Ooo I can't wait for the reviews.

STEPS TO REVIEWING:

1. READ

2. LOOK AT THE BOTTOM OF THE PAGE

3. FIND THE BUTTON THAT SAYS GO

4. CLICK IT (you're almost done)

5. WRITE ME SOMETHING

6. LOOK AT THE BOTTOM OF THE POP UP PAGE

7. FIND THE BUTTON THAT SAYS SUMMIT

8. CLICK IT

9. CLOSE THE POP UP WINDOW

10. PAT YOURSELF ON THE BACK. Congrats you sent me a review


	15. Too much Blood

A/n- This is my Christmas present to you. Hope you enjoy. Okay if you don't celebrate Christmas then this is my present for whatever you celebrate. Lol.

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Lily watched her friends walk away and looked down at her uncle and cousin. "Get up," she spat. She dragged her trunk towards the exit. Her family followed silently. The trip was just as silent as the walk to the car.

She entered the house as quite as possible, and drug her trunk up the stairs to her bedroom. She opened her door to the familiar room she had spend endless hours of her life in.

Her room has changed around often but it was the same as she left it. The bed was under the window that looked out over the street. A nightstand was on either side of the bed. A table was to the left of the door. A green circular rug covered the center of the bare hardwood floor. A small wooden bookcase was up against the right wall.

She dropped her trunk and fell down on her bed. She sat up and glanced around, almost everything was white. Her bedcovers, lampshades, curtains, even her walls were white. Her room was small and very bare, but it was hers.

She got up, opening her trunk to start putting away. She opened her closet door. She grabbed all the folded clothes from her trunk and placed them on the shelves in the closet. Under the green rug, she placed her school books and school things under a loose board.

Lily grabbed a few pictures from the trunk and went to set them on the nightstand. She finished placing them when she realized that she still had a picture of James, the twins, and herself. She picked up the frame, wondering why she still had it.

Raylie looked a lot like she did when she was a toddler. Raylie's hair was still black and curly mess and her eyes were crystal blue. Ryan had an innocent smile and glowing eyes. James was trussing Raylie's hair and James' other hand was around Lily's waist while Ryan was in Lily's lap.

Lily finished unpacking and fell down on her bed. She couldn't believe that she was almost gone from here forever. It was going to be a long two weeks but she would wait it out.

"LILY," someone screamed from below. She rolled her eyes and placed her truck in the bottom of her closet. She glanced around once more before heading down stairs. Her foot hit the wood and she regretted it.

There at the bottom of the stair stood her parents tapping their feet. "Yes ma'am?" Lily questioned.

"Don't 'yes ma'am' in that tone," Her mother said dangerously. Lily slightly caught a glimpse of her uncle and cousin standing behind her parents with a smirk on their faces. Her stomach turned as she realize what was about to happen.

"Yes ma'am," she said in her sweetest tone and looked away slightly.

"Look me in the eye when we're talking to you," Her mother spat.

"Yes ma'am," Lily replied again.

"We heard what happened at the train station," her father said loudly. She saw her sister standing next to her uncle, holding hands with her husband to be. It was entertainment for the family. If it was a show they wanted, she would give them a show.

"So," Lily said in a monotone.

"What did you say?" her father asked in a high pitched voice.

"I said soo," Lily said slowly. Her father's hand rose. Lily laughed, "What are you going to hit me?"

"Don't talk to me that way _mistake_," Her father murderously spat. He swung his hand towards her, which she caught.

"Don't call me a _mistake_," she replied as she punched his stomach. She kept a firm grip on his hand as she noticed her mother about to punch her. She left handed her mother before twisting her fathers hand.

She walked back up the stairs and slammed her door. She was lucky they didn't fight back tonight. She stood at the back of her locked bedroom door as she decided to rearrange her bedroom.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

It had been a week since getting home, and it was Christmas eve. Lily looked at the Christmas tree in her living room, none of the presents under it was for her. They never were. This wasn't her Christmas, she wouldn't have until she was at James. Tomorrow she had to attend her sisters wedding, not as a bridesmaid but as someone in the pews. She wasn't allowed to be a part of the wedding, she was only forced to go to it.

It was getting late, as she stumbled up the stairs to her bedroom. She opened her door, and shut it softly behind her. She fumbled with the lock and threw herself upon her bed where she immediately fell asleep.

She awoke with a pounding on her bedroom door. "Wake up. This is Petunia's day and I wont have you screwing it up."

She turned on the light and went to her closet, where she pulled out a dark green, floor length dress. She stripped and put on the dress. It fit every curve, and the straps were slender on her shoulders. The dress tumbled down her legs as it met it's full length. Lily smiled as she slipped on silver high heels.

After the door was unlocked, she slipped into the bathroom. Where she admired herself in the mirror. She looked at her thick red ringlets, contemplating what to do with her hair. After a while, she decided to leave out her bangs and put a silver headband in it, pushing back some of her hair.

The hair was done so she moved on to make up. She put black eyeliner and mascara on. Then she coated her lips in a clear coat of lip-gloss. She turned of the light and walked down stairs to met up with everyone. Landon looked at her.

"You look nice," He muttered.

"Just because I'm in a dress doesn't mean I still wont kick your arse," she threatened and walked away.

They got to the church and Lily took a seat in the back of the pews. After an hour, Vernon waddled his way to the end of the aisle. He turned towards the doors. Lily saw that slowly the pews were being filled. It took a few minutes for everyone to fill the seats. The music started and everyone stood.

The doors sluggishly opened to reveal Petunia standing in a white floor length dress. On Petunia's arm was her father with a big smile on his face. Then they unhurriedly marched to the top of the aisle. Everyone sat when they reached the head of the aisle. When they got to Vernon, a preacher asked, "Who gives this woman to this man?"

"I do," her father said proudly. He gave Petunia's arm to Vernon and sat next to her mother.

Lily tuned out the rest of the wedding, she was thinking about spells that she should be practicing. Her hand moved with the thoughts of the spells.

"I know pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride," the Preacher announced. Lily sighed in relief of the wedding being over. Everyone stood once again as the married people made their way out of the Church.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

The rest of the week went by in a breeze. It was the day of her birthday and she had already packed her things back into her trunk which now was stored in the bottom of her closet. She grabbed out her trunk and was about to apparate out when Landon and her uncle entered.

"Where are you going?" They demanded.

"Away from here," she answered.

"To your boyfriends?" Landon said.

"What's it to you?" she demanded. He neared her, "Get away from me," she murderously spat. He grabbed her and slammed her against the wall. He lowered his lips to her neck. Her uncle stood behind her, watching it with humor.

Lily struggled and fought but Landon's grip was a bit stronger than she was at that point. He licked her ear. "Get away from me."

Her uncle started in with his son. "We've waited so long to have you alone."

"You're sick, and need help," Lily said.

Landon kissed her, forcing him on her. He deepened the kiss. His father tried to unbutton her shirt. She turned her head back and forth, trying to shake Landon. He pinned her arms to the wall. Her uncle unbuttoned her pants. She kneed her uncle and freed her hand. She punched Landon and kicked her uncle. Her shirt was halfway unbutton and her pants were too.

She wiped her mouth. "You're disusing," she spit at them. Her uncle punched her. Landon kicked her, and then punched her. She spit out blood.

Landon came at her again, she stepped near the window. He tried to force himself on her again, and she felt the window seal on her back. She got in front of him and struggled to push him out the window. He threw another punch that she couldn't dodge. He kneed her in the stomach. She gathered her strength and pushed him out the window. She felt something in her right shoulder. She put her hand to her shoulder and saw the crimson blood covering her hand.

The room was spinning and threaten to go black.

The blade was still there as her uncle punched her again. She pulled out her wand and said, "S-Stop, I'm not afraid to use this."

"You can't, you're not legal," he laughed.

"A witch becomes legal at 17," she replied with a barked laugh. He punched her and she barely apparate in time to miss the second swing.

She sighed as she realized that she had apparate to the right place. It went black, and she collapsed.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

The Potters' and friends were sitting in the living in total silence. They were sipping on hot coco.

James was waiting for Lily to come. She had in fact told him that she would be there on her birthday. He heard a thud outside the house.

"Did you hear that?" he asked.

"Hear what dear?" his mum asked.

He got up and walked out the door, "Hear what dear?" his mum called again.

He opened the front door and saw Lily lying there. "Lily," he breathed. "MUM," he screamed. His mum came rushing to the door. "Oh dear," she muttered. "Pick her up gently and take her to the den."

He laid her down on the couch that everyone cleared off. "Oh my gosh," Carissa covered her mouth.

"What happened," Remus demanded.

James shook his head, and looked at Lily with tears in his eyes. His mum came in the room and ushered them out.

"James?" Alice asked as she put her hand on his shoulder.

"She promised she could handle them," James said as he punched a wall.

"It'll be alright," Sirius said in a quite voice.

"Yea, she'll be okay, with your mum caring for her," Dakota agreed.

It was half an hour before his mum entered the hallway. "How is she?" Remus asked.

"Well, she's lost a lot of blood. She's unconscious. She has a couple broken rib probably from being kicked. There's also a lot of internal bleeding. She has a concussion. And even though she unconscious, she coughing up blood. Also there was a knife wound to her right shoulder," She answered. "I fixed the wound, mended the ribs. I tried my hardest to help the internal bleeding. I managed to get her to stop coughing up blood. But I can't do anything about the concussion and the rest of the internal bleeding with have to wait until she becomes conscious again."

"Dammit," James said.

"James Mason Potter," his mother scolded.

James didn't reply and went into the den with Lily. He pulled up a chair and sat at Lily's head.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

A/n- okay this is my Christmas present to you. Now be nice and reply as your Christmas present to me.

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!

~I'm not a princess~


	16. Cheater

**A/n- long time since I updated. **

**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**

**James sat by Lily's side until she finally woke the next morning. He woke up to her stirring on the couch. She groaned as her eyes finally opened. **

"**Jay?" she croaked. **

"**Lie!" he yelled out joyfully. **

**Everyone rushed in the room. James had already helped her sit up. "I'm fine! I don't need help!" she said.**

**His mum looked at her, "You're not fine."**

"**I'm fine. I'm going to make it," Lily said.**

"**Lily, dear, what happen?" his mum asked.**

**Her eyes flashed with fear as she curled up into the fetal position, rocking back and forth. "I don't want to talk about it."**

"**In order to help make sure this never happens again we need to know what happened. Was it your parents?" his mum tried to reason. **

"**No it was nothing. I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT," she yelled, crying. **

**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**

**Days went by without Lily speaking, she wouldn't talk to anyone, even James. James wanted to know who he was having to kill. **

**He walked into the room where Lily was once again in the fetal position. "Please, baby, I just want to know who did this to you," James pulled her close. **

"**It was horrible. He kissed me and the other one started helping him undress me. I pushed him out the window and the other one stabbed me. How I got out of there, god only knows," Lily answered him.**

"**Who are they?" James asked. Lily shook her head, "Please tell me."**

"**Landon and uncle," Lily said softly. **

**James kissed her head, pulling her closer. She looked at him in the eye for the first time since she had arrived, she lend up and kissed him softly. He let her kiss him, let her deepen it. **

"**I love you," James said as she pulled away.**

"**I love you too," Lily answered. **

**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**

**Going back to Hogwarts was difficult for Lily. Her friends had found out what had happen and were angry. **

**The second day back, she was walking back to the heads common room. Severus had stopped her. **

"**You almost killed your cousin," he stated.**

"**Good."**

"**You're just as heartless as your parents," he spat.**

"**No, I'm not," she answered coldly. **

**He closed the distance between them. He pushed her to the wall. He pinned her arms to the wall, and her legs were locked. He kissed up and down her neck, she struggled. "Come on Lily, you know you want me," he mutter her ear. He kissed her lips trying to deepen the kiss, locking her head in one place. Her lips stay tightly sealed. She heard a scuffle hurrying away, and she thought, **_**Bloody hell**_**. **

**She finally got her leg free and kneed him in his groin. He staggered back, and she had her freedom. She pulled out her wand, aiming it at him. "You're disgusting," she spat.**

**He ran at her, knocking her to the ground. She quickly jumped up and moved to the left. He tried to punch her, she grabbed the fist and swung him into the wall. "You are forgetting, you taught me how to fight. I have more practice."**

"**You're nothing but a mistake," he yelled after her. He saw her turn around and a light racing towards him. **

**She leaned down to his stunned body and whispered in his ear, "I am no mistake. Next time you call me that, I will kill you. That I promise you." She stood and walked away. **

**When she entered the heads common room everyone was staring at her. "How could you?" James stated.**

"**What?" she questioned.**

"**We are through," he said before brushing by her. **

**She grabbed his upper arm, "What did I do?" **

"**You know what you did."**

**She looked around the room when he left, "What did I do?"**

"**You cheated on him with Snape," Carissa answered.**

"**What?" she almost yelled. "I didn't cheat on him."**

"**That's what he is saying. He was standing there the whole time," Remus added.**

"**Obliviously not," Lily said as she slide to the floor. She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. **

"**What do you mean by obliviously not?" Luke asked. **

"**Here I can't explain it," she said as she placed the memory in a bowl. **

**She sat there as they disappeared within the memory. She wanted to cry. **_**Why was everything happening to me?**_** she thought. A few later they appeared with a stunned face on. **

"**I heard someone walk after while he was trying without much success to kiss me. I was struggling the whole time to get free. After the person left, I managed to get my leg free and started to fight. Until he called me a mistake was I going to let him go without many marks," she looked up at them. "It was James watching until he tried to kiss me wasn't it?"**

"**Yes," Sirius nodded. "We need to show him this memory."**

"**You guys need to, he's not going to talk to me," Lily looked at them, begging them.**

**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**

**A/n- this is where I stop. lol. Is James going to listen and enter the memory or not? Find out next chappy.**

**M.M**


	17. Dirty Little Secrets

A/n- okay I know it's been a while since I updated and I'm sorry.

"Prongs," Remus yelled. "We know you're here."

"Go away. I don't want to talk about Lily, or anything else," James' voice echoed from above. Remus and Sirius had followed him to the shack that Remus changed in. James was sitting in the second floor bedroom. Even though his voice was steady, tears were streaking down his face. He knew that Remus and Sirius wouldn't go away, so he tried to dry his tears. _How could she do this to me?_ He wondered silently. "How'd you find me?" He questioned loudly, knowing they we're close.

"We had the map," Sirius answered. "Besides having that, we just know where you would've gone to be alone."

"Exactly I wanted to be alone," James almost yelled.

"We can't let you be alone though, because it's not what you thought," Remus said.

"So you're calling me a liar now, like I didn't see Lily kiss Snape?" James was furious. He saw Lily kiss Snape, willingly. She has been cheating on him for who knows how long. Not anymore.

"No, we're just saying you didn't see everything," Sirius quickly answered.

"I saw enough. Enough to know she's cheating on me," James snapped.

"That's what we're trying to tell you, she wasn't cheating on you."

"And you believe her?" James questioned.

"Yes, we saw her side of the story. Frankly we believe that is what happened because we both know that Snape is a creep and wants whatever you have," Remus knew how to get James to do the right thing. "We have her memory, and it's not tampered with. Just watch it, what harm could it do?"

"Fine, I will. If I don't see anything different than I don't even think about it," James took the veil from Sirius' hand. He emptied the contents into a spare bowl and lend over it, falling into the memory with Sirius and Remus next to him.

He looked away until he knew he was gone, he didn't want to see Lily kiss Snape again. He turned around to see Lily knee Snape. He watched silently as Lily struggle against Snape.

It was over when Snape called her a mistake. She was just going to walk away before he called her that, and James knew that. Instead he made the mistake of calling her something she couldn't take, so she stunned him. Leaning low over him, telling him that she was no mistake and that she would kill him next time. The three of them were pulled out of the memory, forcible.

That wasn't the Lily he had know, it was kind of freighting. He noticed that she wasn't the helpless girl he had known. She had become harsh, cold, and fearless. She would kill anything that reminded her of her past, but he knew he would too.

"So?" Remus broke the silence.

"Where's the map?" Sirius threw the map to James. "I solemnly swear I am up to now good," he said tapping it lightly. He opened the pages looking for two things, Lily and Raylie. His eye found Lily's dot easily like they did so many times before but no matter how many times he traced over the map with his eyes, he just couldn't find Raylie. "Well mate, we have two problems," James said quietly.

"What Prongs?"

"Are you sure Lily will take me back after I accused her of cheating?" James lifted his eyes, looking Sirius in the eye.

"I'm sure mate. She knows what you saw and what really happened. You just have to tell her how much of an idiot you were being," Sirius answered.

"What's the other problem?" Remus looked back and forth between Sirius and James, waiting for an answer.

"The other problem is my sisters and brother were killed 7 years ago. How can a ghost just appear?" James questioned, throwing Remus the map. "She's nowhere on this map." Remus and Sirius scanned every corridor at least twice, yet James was right there wasn't a trace of Raylie on the map. They looked up at him with a questioning look.

"Come on, we need the other's help with this," Remus threw the cloak over the three of them, exiting the tunnel into the grounds of Hogwarts. They took every secret passage back to heads common room. They rushed into the common room startling everyone.

"Hey," Sirius announced.

"Lily?" James asked. She came into view. "I'm sorry. I should've gotten the whole story. I should've realized that I know that you're not the cheating type."

"You're right, you should've," she wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him softly.

"There's something else as well," Sirius included. They looked at him, faces full of confusion. Sirius nodded to James.

"It's about Raylie."

"I thought that we all agreed that she is your sister," Carissa answered.

"Things just aren't adding up," James replied. "I just have a feeling that something is very wrong."

"How so, Jay?" Lily asked.

"Just it's been 7 years since Madelynn, Susan, Ryan, and Raylie was killed. Why is it now that Raylie shows up? Where did Raylie's body go? Why didn't she show up before now? Obliviously she knew about mum, dad, Lily, and me. Also, there is no trace of her on this map at all. None. Not a goddamn trace. Why wouldn't she be on the map?" James looked around questioning each of them, trying to get them to answer something even he couldn't answer.

"Show us your memory," Lily demanded. "We need to see it to help you. You don't need to watch it."

He pulled the memory and placed it in a bowl. One by one they disappeared into James' memory, James being the last one to enter.

_He heard noises down stairs. He grabbed the invisibility clock from his chair, hiding under it. He moved down the stair, as stealthily as he could. He noticed Susan and Madelynn were back. A confused look crossed his face, they were suppose to be at Hogwarts._

_James noticed the look on their faces, his dad explained what the imperior curse could do and how the looks on people's faces are slightly different. Madelynn was shaking her head. It looked like she was trying to fight it. Suddenly she screamed bloody murder, "Run, Death Eaters," and then the confused look appeared._

_Mum and dad would be proud of Madelynn. He looked at the clock at the very least there was five minutes till Halloween. __One hell of a birthday present, __James thought. Raylie and Ryan were able to walk or run when necessary._

_Less than a second later Death Eaters started searching every room. They collected Madelynn, Susan, Raylie, Ryan and his parents in the living room. A Death Eater spoke, his voice disoriented. "Is there any more?"_

"There I am," James said, pointing towards the corner where he hid years ago. "You'll see me in a brief minute put my hand out of the cloak."

_His parent looked for James. James poked a hand quickly out of the clock, and he knew his parents were going to say, "No, everyone is here."_

_Raylie and Ryan whimpered. The Death Eater took the curse off of Susan and Madelynn. "We want to see the look on you face when you die," they told Susan and Madelynn as the lifted it._

_Susan shook in fear, while Madelynn stood calmly. Midnight was closing in. The Death Eaters rose their wands, pointing at Susan, Madelynn, Raylie, and Ryan muttering __Crucio__. Madelynn let a few tears run down her cheek but not daring to yell aloud. Refusing to give them what they wanted. Susan on the other hand, screamed as loud as she could._

_Ryan did a mixture of crying and screaming. Raylie screamed bloody murder. Her scream was so high pitched and loud the Death Eaters removed the curse just to plug their ears._

_James looked at his siblings. Susan's eyes were filled with fear and hurt. Ryan's eyes showed the same as Susan's. Madelynn was bubbling over with anger. Raylie's crystal eyes were as calm as calm can be. James was taken aback by the calmness of Raylie's eyes._

"They are about to start killing them," James said. He knew every second of this memory.

_One minute till Halloween. The leading Death Eater raised his wand, pointing directly at Madelynn. "Say goodbye Madelynn."_

_Madelynn's eyes grew as green light surrounded her. His parent screamed out, crying and pleading for them to stop._

_The Death Eater turned on Susan. "Bye Susan," he said in a mocking voice. Just like her sister, she was surrounded by the same green light._

_The clock stroke midnight as the Death Eater turned on Ryan. "Say you bye's Ryan." He was surrounded by quietness. The tears had fallen when the Death Eater said curse._

"Now be careful to watch Raylie."

_Raylie was next. Her blue eyes locked with his as the Death Eater turned to face her. "You get to see you brother and sisters now," Raylie's eyes were calm as the green light filled them. The mischievous glint in them was still there as she fell out of her seat._

_An eerie silence followed, as his parents silently cried. The Death Eaters filed out of the room, leaving behind a dark mark symbol._

_It felt like an eternity later before the Ministry of Magic showed up. The next few hours consisted of death reports, trying to find out who was dead, and trying to find the bodies._

"_Ma'am, who all were killed?" one Ministry personal asked, almost unemotional._

"_My three daughters and my son," Mrs. Potter replied._

"_What would be there names?" he continued._

"_Madelynn Jordan Potter. Susan Faye Potter. Ryan Benjamin Potter. Raylie Brooke Potter," she answered._

"_Are you sure," he asked, cocking an eyebrow._

"_Why do you ask?" she questioned frighten._

"_We only found 3 bodies Ma'am," he replied._

_He heard is mum take a deep breath in. "What color eyes do they have?"_

_The man was taken aback by the questioned before walking over to someone, whispering in his ear. He returned seconds later. "Hazel," He confirmed._

"_Raylie. Its Raylie missing," she said without a second thought._

"_How do you know Ma'am?" he kept questioning._

_She handed him a photograph of James, Madelynn, Susan, Ryan, and Raylie. "Look at the eyes. Raylie's eyes are the only ones that are blue."_

They were pulled out of the memory as it faded. They stared stunned at James. "Oh god Jay, I didn't know that's how they went," Lily looked him in the eyes.

"And I watched as if I was frozen in my spot. I couldn't help them. I felt so guilty. I let them die. I was worried about my life then Raylie's and Ryan's. I watched them kill her and they took her body. And now what is she doing, showing up 7 years later?" James questioned.

"Very good, James," an icy voice appeared behind the group. "I was starting to wonder when you finally figure out my dirty little secret."


	18. What's going on in James' head?

A/n- this is the earliest I have updated in a while. Hope you enjoy.

The group turned around to see two children of the same height. Lily and James looked pale as they saw the two people in their head's common room. They looked identical with pale skin, and closed eyes. Their hands were locked together. The girl's curly raven hair was up in a pony tail tied together with an icy blue ribbon, while the boy's curly raven hair was hanging in a shaggy mess. Their eyes remained close as the girl's icy voice filled the air, "I was starting to wonder when you would figure it wasn't real."

"What are you talking about?" James questioned, holding Lily's hand tightly.

A chilling laugh broke the silence. "This isn't real James. Everything is a lie," The girl's eyes opened, revealing her blue eyes that immediately turned black. "Ryan and I are just part of your mind. You need to wake up; they are going to kill you if you don't wake up." The boy's eyes opened, showing his brown eyes that immediately turned black.

"This is just a charm." Ryan whispered.

"We know you blame yourself for our deaths but it wasn't your fault," Raylie pleaded with James. "We're just glad you're alive to help mum and dad."

They started walking away. "Wait, don't go," James pleaded.

"We have to. We're not suppose to be here," Raylie's chilly voice was fading.

He wanted to chase after them but he was felt frozen. It was dark, and growing darker. He looked around him and saw nothing. _Why can't I see anyone? They were just here. I didn't feel Lily's hand leave mine. Oh god. Am I going crazy?_

"James," a voice was questioning him. _Where is that coming from?_

"Come on Prongs, wake up." He felt hands on his arms but they weren't anywhere he couldn't see anyone.

Remus and Sirius grabbed James by the arms, trying to get him to the hospital wing. They hurried in, yelling, "Help!"

The nurse exited her office, "What happened?"

Remus helped Sirius lay James on the closest bed. "We don't know. We just found him passed out."

"You may go. Come back in an hour, and hopefully I will have information as to what happened to your friend," the nurse said.

The two of them left the hospital wing, returning to the heads common room. When they entered the room all the girls were staring at them.

"Where's James?" Lily asked.

"He's in the hospital wing. When we found him, he was unconscious. So we rushed him to the hospital wing but the nurse told us to come back in an hour," Remus answered.

Lily dropped to the floor crying.

A/n- dum dum dum lol. I hope ya'll liked. What's wrong with James????


	19. Do you have any memories?

A/n- It's been a long hard week. I'm glad for my reviewers that have stuck with me through thick and thin, and I just wanted to say thanks and that I been trying to update more often.

The group has been sitting in the heads common room for the longest time. They didn't feel like doing anything, they just wanted James back. The bell chimed signaling the hour has been up. So they scurried to the hospital wing.

"Enter," the nurse said from behind the door when the knock came on the closed door. Remus pushed the doors open, and led the way into James. The group gathered around the foot of James' bed. Remus noticed several gashes and bruises that neither he nor Sirius had seen when they carried him here. They all stood silently, waiting for the nurse to finish with another patient. Lily was silently crying as she stared at James in his broken state. _This is all my fault._

"Well Mr. Potter is pretty banged up, but he'll be okay. It seems that he inflicted these wounds on himself, though I cannot be for certain. He's asleep for now, but it seems like he's have a nightmare because he has been thrashing about and yelling," the nurse informed.

"When will he be awake?" Lily asked in a whisper.

"Again, I cannot be for certain. It seems as if his body is unwilling to let him wake. If he doesn't wake up before Friday I will attempt to wake up, though that can be very dangerous," she answered. "Now if you will excuse me I have another patient to attend to. You are more than welcome to stay for a while; I doubt that he can hear anyone."

They conjured up chairs and made a semicircle around his bed. Everyone looked silently as Lily pulled her chair to the head of his bed, taking a hold of his hand. He flinched when she touched him, but they failed to notice this small gesture. They sat quietly watching James sleeping. The longer Lily held his hand, the more he thrashed around. He screamed, "No don't go. Please. I need you."

When he burst out, they would look around questioning. "What do you think he's dreaming about?" Sirius said, finally breaking the silence.

"Well knowing James, its either Lily or Raylie," Remus answered, laughing. James violently shook at the mention of their names. They moved as far away as possible, without leaving their seats.

"What's going on?" Carissa asked, almost crying. "Can he hear us?"

"It seems like he freaks out whenever he hears your name," he nodded towards Lily. "And when he hears his sister's name. Whatever you do, don't say their names."

"We need to wake him up," Dakota replied. "James, wake up."

"Prongs, come on you need to wake up."

"Prongs, James, you can fight this. We know you can," Sirius almost yelled at him. "We know you can. We need you to wake up."

He didn't budge. "Come on Jay; wake up for me, and for everyone else. We need you to be here and so does your sister. We all need you here. All you need to do is wake up," Lily's voice cracked as begged him to wake up, her tears dropping onto his hand that she was holding. "Just find a way to wake up for us."

"It's time for you all to leave," the nurse said quietly, sadness in her eyes. "You may come back tomorrow as soon as your classes are finished."

They walked silently back to the common room, wondering what happened to James. "Ya'll are more than welcome to conjuror cots and sleep in my common room," Lily offered. They looked at each other, agreeing that they would. They entered the head's common room, and started to move things around to make room for 7 cots. They didn't feel like talking, so they just went to sleep.

The next day they made it down to the Great Hall and every eye was on them as they entered. Several people came up to them and asked what happened to James. "News travels fast around here," Dakota tried to laugh but couldn't, none of them could. They were worried about James. They tried hard without success to pay attention to their classes. Everyone could tell what was heavily on their minds.

It was finally time to see James, and they couldn't wait so they rushed to the hospital wing. When they entered, they saw James sitting up and drinking a glass of pumpkin juice. They ran over to him. "James, it's good to have you back," Sirius said, patting his shoulder.

"I'm not meaning to be rude, but who are you?" James asked quietly.

"Wait you don't know who we are?" Remus questioned. Sirius and Remus exchanged looks.

"No. People keep coming up to me saying, 'We heard what happened, and we're glad you're okay James.'" James answered. "I don't know who James is, or what even happened." He looked up with questioning glance.

Remus left to find the nurse, leaving the others to try to help him remember anything.

"So what do you remember?" Dakota asked.

"Nothing," James muttered. "Why can't I remember anything? I don't even know who I am."

"We're trying to figure that out, just hold on," Lily said softly, rubbing his back gently.

"Who am I?" James looked at Lily, then around at everyone in the circle. "Will you tell me?"

"Your name is James Potter," Lily looked at him sadly.

Remus returned with the nurse. "Well it seems like you're awake, Mr. Potter. And it also seems like you have lost your memory. Is that true?"

"Yes. What is wrong with me?" James asked.

"It seems that when you disappeared that someone attacked you," the nurse, mainly to the rest of the group. "This spell more than likely whipped your memory, or also, you could have fallen extremely hard. But that isn't as likely. For now all that we can do is try to help you recover your memory."

A/n- again dum dum dum. What has happened to James, you might ask. You shall find out soon.


	20. Hospital Wing

A/n- okay so I thought you might want to know that I haven't really planned out the entire plot of this story and it's been going by a whim for the past 3 or 4 chapters. And it shall continue on that whim until I get the story where I want it to be at. I have a couple of scenes in my mind and that's where the story is going to go. Lol.

They sat around James trying to explain his life. Lily was able to fill in more of the blanks that the others could. "So what is my name again?"

"Your name is James Mason Potter," Remus replied.

"Okay so where am I?"

"You're at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry," Carissa answered. "You're a wizard."

"A wizard? As in I can curse somebody with words? Am I evil?" James looked around with a questioning glare.

"No you are not evil; we're on the good side. And yes you can curse someone with words, but you need a wand to make something happen. You can also do other things with a wand you just need to know how to use one, which we will show you within a couple days," Sirius explained.

"Do I have a family? A mum, dad, sister, brother?"

Lily chimed in at this point, "Yes you do. Your parents are still together and should be here shortly to see you. You have three sisters and a brother, but two of the three sisters were killed and so was your brother."

He looked at Lily with puzzled face. "How do you know so much about me?"

"We all know a lot about you, not just her," Dakota answered. "We are your truest friends, so of course we know so much about you. Hopefully soon you will regain your memory."

He looked around, but his eyes fell back on Lily. "Have you met my family? What were their names? What were my siblings like?"

Lily smiled at the memories, "Yes I have met your family. Madelynn was the oldest of all of you, and then came Susan, you were next and then a few years later came the twins, Ryan and Raylie. Madelynn was very smart and talented, and she was also on the Quidditch team for Gryffindor. Susan was beautiful and slightly shy. Ryan was quiet, and looked a lot like you. Raylie was very beautiful and you loved her so much. When they were born on Halloween, you named her, Raylie Brooke Potter."

"It sounds like you really knew them," James stated. James continued to question them about his past and present, but they all avoided telling him how his siblings were killed. When he would touch on the subject, they would turn the conversation.

"Lily!" The nurse called. "Come here." She got up and exited the hospital wing. There she saw two figures. "I felt that you can best describe the situation to them," then the nurse went back into the hospital wing, leaving them alone.

"What happened?" James' dad asked. He was a splitting image of James, except his eyes shone with hardness, and his hair was graying. He was holding the hand of James mum, who was slender and had streaks of gray through her strawberry blonde hair.

"We believe he got attacked," Lily said with an edge in her voice.

"By who? How did this happen?"

"He left after he thought I was cheating but I wasn't, and in the ten minutes it took me to explain it to the others he must of got attacked or hurt himself," Lily said, unable to look them in the eye. They were the closest thing she had to parents, and she couldn't take disappointing them like that.

"Cheating? With who?" James' mum urged.

"Snape cornered me and was trying to doing what my uncle and cousin did. I was fighting him but James didn't really see it. It wasn't until James left that I was able to break the grip on me. James only saw part of it, and thought I was cheating so he broke up with me and stormed away. I didn't follow him and I should've. It's all my fault," Lily cried silently. James' mum pulled her into a hug, smoothing her hair down. "Now James doesn't have his memory, and we can't do much about it."

James' parents looked at each other, terrified. "So he doesn't know anybody? Not even himself?"

"No he believes what we have been telling him, which is the truth. We just won't tell him how Madelynn, Susan, and Ryan died. We thought we would spare him the memories of that," Lily answered. "We also are sparing him the memories of me and him."

"Why? He loves you?" James' dad asked.

"Because he doesn't need someone like me," Lily answered. "I hope you will respect that I don't want him to know. I think it's best this way. I'm the only girl he's ever known; he should try a couple different girls again. And he doesn't need to feel guilty about my parents and my past anymore, now that he doesn't have those memories. But if you will excuse me, I'm heading back to the heads common room." She looked them in the eyes for the first time since they arrived, turned and walked away.

His parents pushed the doors open, and walked over to James. James looked up at them with a curious look. "Hey James, we're your parents."

"Oh, they said you would be coming by," James answered, matter-of-factly.

"How are you doing?" James' mum asked.

"I'm okay. These people are telling me who I am," James smiled slightly.

They spent a couple more hours with him, telling him about his past. Soon, they were kicked out by the nurse. "He needs his rest," she walked with them to the door. "Come back tomorrow."

"What's been going on with Lily?" James' dad asked.

"What do you mean?" Carissa questioned.

"Why doesn't she want James to know about her and his relationship? They practically grew up together and now she doesn't want him to remember what they have gone through together," He replied.

"She feels guilty. She thinks it's her fault that he can't remember and that he can do better than her. But she needs him to be there for her, she can't handle much more without him," Dakota said quietly.

When they got to head's common room, they found it empty. "She must have gone to bed." So they conjuror up cots and readied themselves for bed.

James stayed in the hospital wing for the rest of the week, and every day the group would join him in there trying to teach him spells that he needed to know. His parents left three days after they arrived, having been called back to work. He finally remembered some memories of his parents. He was still having trouble remembering most of his memories, but he remembered most of the spells within minutes. He still didn't remember people or places, just small things, but remembering something's was better than not remembering at all.

A/n- hope you enjoyed. Hopefully I will be able to update very soon.

REVIEW PLEASE!!! I will be so happy if you did!!!


	21. Selena

A/n- update time!!!!! Whoohoo!!! I can tell there might be some difficulty seeing it the time has changed, I'm trying to work on that. Any idea on how to separate the different times within a chapter please tell me. =) enjoy.

James was adapting quite quickly into his new life. Most of the spells he learned throughout his years at Hogwarts were back, and he was released from the Hospital wing. His friends kept by his side at all time. Lily sometimes would sit with him but she was silent around him. The whole school realized that Lily and James were dating anymore, so the girls started lining up again.

It was the weekend following his release when Sirius took James out on the Quidditch field for the first since the accident. Sirius threw James a broom and then he mounted. "Okay so I'm going to show you how to play Quidditch," Sirius said. "Go ahead and mount."

James looked at his broom, and then at how Sirius was sitting on his and climbed on. "I feel a little idiotic," James laughed.

"Its okay, nobody thinks you're idiotic if you ride a broom in this world," Sirius chuckled. "So what you have to do is hold on tightly, and kick the ground as hard you can okay? Like this," Sirius kicked off and started to rise before touching down.

James kicked off, and started to rise. He rose 50 meters, then 100 meters, and then 150 meters. "Sirius, how do I stop going up?"

"Try to do it yourself. We need you to get your memory back on your own," Sirius yelled, flying towards him. "But if you go to high, I'll tell you how to get down."

James looked at his broom then frantically back at Sirius. He closed his eyes and thought hard, and then he lends the handle of the broom down. A smile spread across his face, and he laughed. He started speeding across the Quidditch field and back again. "I feel so alive," he yelled.

"So it came back?" Sirius questioned.

"Of course it did, Padfoot," James answered.

"How do you know that name?" Sirius looked at him.

"I keep hearing Padfoot and Moony in my head. I figured that if I called you one of them I would figure out what they mean and who they are," James shrugged.

Sirius didn't answer him, but instead flew off, grabbing the snitch from its container. For the next couple hours James and Sirius enjoyed themselves, playing with the snitch. They were laughing as they walked back into Great Hall for dinner. They joined the others at the Gryffindor table.

A girl approached James. She was shorter than James by a head, with blonde curly hair. Her crystal blues followed his movement. She tapped him on the shoulder and he turned to face her. His brown eyes met her blue ones as he said, "Hello."

"Hi, James right?" she muttered.

"Yes, and you are?" he raised his eyebrow at her.

"Selena," she smiled a toothy grin. He smiled back.

"How are you, Selena?" he tried to make conversation.

"I was wondering if you would go out with me?" she questioned looking into his eyes.

"Sure," he stood up, walking out of the Great Hall with her close at his heels.

Once they were out the hall, Lily walked away. She made it up to the Heads common room before she heard footsteps behind her. She muttered the password, leaving the painting open. The group followed her into the lounge, where they sat down on the couches and sofas. Lily curled up in the chair, where everyone was staring at her. "Stop staring," she said, not turning her head.

"We're just trying to make sure your okay with James dating other girls again," Alice replied to her outburst.

"Of course I'm okay with him dating other girl again. I'm the one who did want him to have the memory of us," Lily said, trying her hardest to keep her voice even and steady.

When they left an hour later, she let her tears stream down her face, without shame. "I knew it would be hard to do, but never thought it would be this hard. It's like losing him all over again," she told herself. They could be best friends again but she knew she would always want what they had. She knew now that it was off limits, because he had a new girlfriend.

"Lily," James called, as he entered the common room. She jolted awake. She looked at him, "You should go to bed," he whispered.

She nodded sleepily, and scurried to bed. She lay in her bed, and the tear poured down her face again. She didn't try to hide it but when the knock came on her door, she tried her hardest not to sound like she was crying when she said, "Yes?"

"Good ni-," James broke off. "Have you been crying?"

"No," Lily lied. James looked at her with one eyebrow raised, "Yes."

"Can I come in?"

"Yes," Lily replied.

"Turning on the light," James warned. He crossed the room and sat beside her. "Why are you crying?"

"It's stupid," Lily answered.

"Come on, we're best friends. You can tell me anything," James tried.

"You wouldn't understand."

"You're right I probably wouldn't, but it would feel better to get it off your chest. Now, don't you think?" James smile.

She looked at him, before telling him what happened, without telling him the whole. "I had been best friends with a guy since I was 7. As we grew up together, we started having feeling for each other that we couldn't explain. Soon we started dating, but when my best friend moved away things got really bad for me. It wasn't until a year after he moved that I was accepted to Hogwarts. Whenever I got here, I saw my best friend. I didn't treat him as my best friend anymore, we weren't even friends. We fought constantly. He was trying to make things like it use to be between us, but I didn't want that. It would be 6 years after we started attending Hogwarts, that we would realized how much we needed each other. We realized that we had been through what we did because it was something that we could share forever. We needed to be there for each, to help one another through thick and thin. We started dating again, and he was there for me always. Then he thought he saw me cheating on him, but I wouldn't ever cheat, you know? So he broke up with me. Now when I need him the most, he's not here. I hope he'll learn how much I need him in time," Lily let a tear fall down her face, that James brushed away.

"I hope he'll figure out that as well," James whispered, then he lend up and kissed her forehead and left.

A/n- Okay so this took a little while to type. I like it, and I'm hoping you like it as well =) Thank you all my loving reviewers/ readers, if it wasn't for y'all I wouldn't write at all. Happy Fanficing.


	22. Dreams

A/n- It's hard to quickly update most of the time because I'm not home during the weekends, and I have school, and friends. So I'm sorry if I'm not updating as often as you would like me to. Sorry I've been having difficulty with my word document.

When Lily entered the Great Hall the next morning, she spotted James sitting with everybody and Selena. She joined them, and James looked up at her. "Are you feeling okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine," Lily answered and started eating.

Everyone looked at her then at James, he shrugged his shoulders and continued eating. Lily quickly finished eating and left in a hurry, Selena was following Lily with her eyes as she exited. James stood and attempted to follow Lily, but Selena met his eyes, silently telling him he shouldn't follow. He looked to the entrance of the Great Hall before taking his seat again.

They continued to talk until five minutes before the bell. The Great Hall was emptying as it was drawing close to class time, so they gathered their things and left. Selena took James' hand in her hand, and walked to her first class. He said goodbye and left. When he entered the class, he took a seat next to Lily. She was silent throughout the class and the rest of the day.

James would walk Selena to every class, and then would go to his class. He would sit down next to the silent Lily. He didn't know why he was so drawn to Lily but there was something about her that he couldn't get enough of.

Lily would barely talk to anyone. It had been weeks since James and Selena had started dating. James was talking to Selena in the Gryffindor common room, when she finally went up to go to bed. James stayed in the common room a little longer. His eyes shut and he drifted off to sleep.

_It was dark and quiet as he looked around the room. There were eight people in the room. He noticed that there were two adults and six children. The six children were dress up in Halloween outfits. The youngest girl was dressed as ladybug; the youngest boy was dressed as pumpkin. There were three other girls in the room, and a boy that looked exactly like himself. The oldest girl was dressed in a witches outfit. The next oldest girl was dressed in a 50's puddle dress. The only redhead was dressed in a green dress, and fairy wings. The boy was dressed as a pirate, with an eye patch and a fake mustache. _

"_Madelynn, make sure that all of you are back in an hour. James, Lily, you get to look after Raylie and Ryan," The women said. _

"_We'll be back in an hour," Susan agreed. They went to exit the door, trick-or-treating just for an hour. James followed the children around the neighborhood, getting a sense of déjà vu. They would knock, and when the people would answer the door, they would say, "Trick or treat."_

_The adults would look at the youngest two in the stroller. "How old are they?"_

"_They just turned one today," James said proudly._

"_Aw, what are their names?" they would lend down and pinch their cheeks. _

"_Raylie and Ryan," Susan would answer. _

James looked at the two babies in the stroller, and he felt something that he hadn't felt in a while. He wanted to pick the girl up and just hold her for hours.

"_Come on Susan, James, Lily, we don't have much longer before we have to go home," Madelynn said, strolling away. _

_They hit up a couple more houses before returning home. "Mum, dad, we're home," Susan called. His parents came down the stairs. The oldest girls handed all the candy they had gotten to their parents before heading up the stairs. _

_James picked Raylie from the stroller, taking her up the stair and Lily follow James, holding Ryan. James and Lily changed the twins out of their Halloween outfits, placed them in their cribs, and sat down in the rocking chair. _

"_It's hard to believe they are one today," James whispered._

"_Yea, I know. They are growing up so fast," Lily answered. _

"_You looked beautiful tonight," James smiled. _

_Lily blushed. _

He woke up with a jolt. He rubbed his eyes, and sat still. He finally stood up and went to the heads common room. There he saw Lily and the others. He saw the little girl that was in the rocking chair. "Why didn't you tell me?" James demanded.

A/n- This is where I leave you until next time. I hope you enjoyed. =) Have a good week and happy Fanficing.


	23. Remorse

A/n- I'm sorry been at my sisters all weekend like usual. But I am updating if it's the last thing I do tonight. Hoping my word document won't decide it doesn't want me to update. But I am 2% smarter than the equipment I am trying to operate. Anyways, this chapter is going to have a few flashbacks in the forms of Lily's memories, since I never really went into specifics of their past.

"Tell you what?" Lily asked, looking from James to the rest of her friends.

"You know what," James muttered.

"I really don't know what you are talking about," Lily answered.

"Honestly, I thought I could trust you," James answered, "but you lying about my past is a sign I can't."

"Do I get a chance to explain?" Lily asked. Everyone around them just looked back and forth between the two. When James nodded his approval, she started talking again. "There are a lot of things in our past that makes us different from everybody else. I didn't want to see that look in your eyes that I always saw. I thought if you didn't know that you wouldn't pity me anymore. Beside, I'm the only girl you've ever thought about. You needed to make sure I was right. How did you find out? I'm pretty sure your girlfriend didn't tell you."

"A dream," James answered. They looked at him like he was an idiot. He noticed their expressions and added quickly, "It was any kind of dream, it felt so real."

"Okay I'll make you a deal, you show us that memory so I can figure out if it's real or not and I'll show you all the important memories of us. Deal?" Lily answered.

"Yes," James said without hesitation.

Lily looked at the others, "You are more than welcome to see the memories."

James took his most recent dream and put it in a bowl. The group, one by one, lend over the bowl entering his memory. Lily smiled as she realized what memory this was. As everyone was watching, she informed them of the memory in question. "This is real. It's Halloween 1968. We were 8, taking the twins out for their first birthday."

Everyone looked at her. "They were born on Halloween 1967. The girl is Raylie Brooke, which James named, and the boy is Ryan Benjamin, which Madelynn and Susan named. It became a tradition to take them trick-or-treating for their birthday." She finished as they were being pulled out of the memory.

"When I dreamed this, I had a powerful feeling to pick up Raylie," James stated.

"Those were your siblings?" Remus asked.

Lily answered, "Yes they were his siblings." She was quiet for a minute and then put her wand to side of her head, pulling out the next memory. She placed it in the bowl. "This is the first day James and I met. I'm sitting this one out. I can't stomach to look at my parents."

They came out a few minutes later, "Aw," Carissa said. "That's so sweet."

"What's the next memory?" James asked.

"Our first Christmas together," Lily answered. She placed the memory in the bowl, and again one by one they entered.

"_Five, four, three, two, one. Happy Christmas," Susan, Madelynn, James, and Lily yelled. _

"_Can we open presents?" Susan asked impatiently. Madelynn had already started passing out presents, not waiting for the answer._

"_Susan," Madelynn called, placing the present in Susan's pile. "Lily." Everyone saw the shock on her face as she was handed the gift to put in her pile. It continued like this for the next fifteen minutes. Finally after they had all the gifts one by one they opened gifts. _

_Lily opened with shaking hands, since this had been the first time she had received gift for any holiday. She opened chocolate first and a smile spread across her face. The next box she opened was chocolate as well. She opened the chocolate before opening the next box. She found a beautiful green dress. The next and final box she opened had a silver locket in it. On the front of the locket had the words _I love you_ in cursive letters. Around the edge of the locket were alternating rubies and emeralds. She was unable to open it, but found that James' initials and hers were engraved on the back. She sat quietly while the others opened their gifts. Raylie and Ryan were the last to open their presents, of course with the help of James and Lily. After they had finished opening presents, they headed to bed. Lily picked up Ryan, heading for the twin's room, while James held Raylie. _

_They laid the twins in their respective beds and sat in the rocking chair in the twin's room. "So did you like your presents?" James asked. _

"_I loved them. Can you help me put on my necklace?" Lily asked. He fastens the chain around her neck. _

"_Lie, I want to ask something?" _

"_What Jay?" Lily asked. _

"_Would you like to go out with me?" _

"_What?" she questioned. _

"_Well Susan told me that when a person likes someone they ask that person to go out with them," James explained quietly, blushing. _

"_I like you, so yes I would," Lily said cuddling even closer. The room faded from her eyes. _

They were forcefully pulled out of the memory.

"That was so cheesy," Sirius laughed.

"You have to realized we were only 8 at that time," Lily laughed. "But looking back on it now, it was cheesy."

They all laughed. "So what's the next memory?" James asked.

"Do you want to see our first kiss?" Lily asked.

"Yes," the group answered. "You asked for it," Lily laughed. They entered the next memory.

"_Wait up, Jay," Lily yelled. _

"_You hurry up," James laughed. They ran through the woods and the rain. They were both laughing, running aimlessly through the woods in their backyard. It was pouring, making Lily's dress stick to her body as well as James' clothes stick to his. But they didn't care, they were enjoying themselves. _

_They had stumbled upon a lake. "How far did we go?" Lily asked, finally catching up to James. _

"_I don't know, we must be pretty far out because I've never seen this place," James answered. _

"_Look," Lily pointed into the tree. On one of the branches sat a prefect tree house. It was painted a light blue, and the details were in dark blue. It had a roof, walls, and window. "Whoever did that it must have taken them a while to finish. It's beautiful," Lily said in awe. _

"_Yeah, it must have," James agreed. "It's nice that it is facing the water, must be a nice view."_

"_I want to dance," Lily announced. James laughed before holding out his hand for her to take. When Lily grasped his hand, he pulled her to him. _

"_Thankfully mum and dad sent me to dancing lessons. I never thought they would come in handy," James laughed. _

"He took dancing lessons?" Sirius barked a laugh.

"Yes, we danced several times," Lily answered, smiling. "He was a good dancer before he went to dancing lesson, but he got better after he finished."

_James held Lily close as they spun in circles. "I love you," James told her. _

"_I love you too," Lily replied. He spun her in circles, as she laughed. _

_He stopped her where she was facing him. He looked at her before kissing her lips. "No, I mean it. I want to marry you one day."_

_She smiled, lending up to kiss him. "We'll see about that," she answered. _

_The memory faded as they exited. _

"That was your first kiss?" Dakota asked.

"Yes, that was our first kiss. We were ten," Lily answered.

"I told you I wanted to marry you at ten?" James questioned.

"Yes, I didn't think you really meant it," Lily said. "Well not on that day."

"Why?" Alice asked.

"We were ten. I didn't think I would find Mr. Right at seven years old. It was that simple. But after a while I believed him. He told me several times that he wanted to marry me. After a while it makes you believe," Lily replied. "You know?"

"What memory is next?" Remus asked.

"I want to see why we broke up," James answered.

"You mean the day you moved. Okay, if that's what you want to see. But it'll be my version, so you'll see what happened afterwards," Lily answered. She was the last one to enter the memory.

_Lily looked at James, who looked miserable. She saw filled boxes, and didn't know why. Nothing seemed to be there anymore. "Lie I need to talk to you."_

_"Why, Jay?"_

_"You'll find out, just follow me," he said in a broken voice._

_He took her outside. A moving truck was parked outside. Most of the boxes were in the truck, only the boxes she seen inside was left. Lily turned on James. "You're __moving__?"_

_His eyes looked hurt as he looked at her. He wasn't smiling. "Mum's making us."_

_"Why?" Lily asked, pain could be seen in her eyes._

_"Mum wants to see the world. And of course Dad will agree on anything she says," he lied._

_Tears broke from her eyes. "Don't go please. You're the only thing saving me."_

_"I have to," was all he could say._

_"You're breaking your promises. How can you. How can you do this to me?" Lily yelled._

_His parent called his name. The twins wandered over to Lily, clinging onto her legs. She kneeled, hugging both of them. Susan walked over next. "You're like a sister. I'm sorry about this."_

_Madelynn hugged her, "I'll see you again someday."_

_Lily cried even harder. James pulled her into a hug. Everyone turned around and walked towards the moving truck. He took that moment to kiss her. He kissed her longer than he normally would. He pulled back, "I'll always love you Lie. Always. Please don't hurt yourself. Please. I promise I'll be seeing you soon."_

_She fell to the ground crying harder than she ever has. She watched as the Potter's drove down the road, not looking back._

_She sat there in the Potter's driveway for a while, as if she was frozen to the spot. The sun was setting but she didn't want to leave. _

"_Why?" she yelled even though there wasn't a soul to talk to. She went inside where she found a bag with her stuff in it. James had taken the time to write out a letter. She didn't want to face her parents; it was too much to bare in one day, so she pulled a blanket and a pillow out of the bag and headed towards what use to be James' room. She curled up on the hardwood floor, and cried herself to sleep. _

"That must have been hard," Carissa said.

"Yea, I think I slept at his empty house for a week before getting the courage to go home," Lily answered. "What's next?"

"I'm starting to remember all this stuff. I want to see the first time they beat you, and when you first met Snape," James requested.

"Here we go, Snape first," Lily said, pulling the memory from her head.

_It was sunny as she was returning from primary school. She didn't want to return home, so she walked as slowly as possible. There was a whispered behind her. She turned around in a fright. Behind her, a boy with greasy hair and a half smile on his face. _

"_Hello," The boy croaked. _

"_Hello," Lily answered. "How are you?" _

"_Fine, what's your name?" he asked._

"_Lily," she replied. _

"_Severus," he held out his hand. _

_She took it in her hand, shaking it with a smile on her face. "Where do you live?"_

"_At the end of the road, not far from here," he answered. "And you?"_

"_That house," she pointed to her two story house. "Though I wish I didn't."_

"_Why?"_

"_I don't want to talk about it," Lily replied. "Well I have to go, I'll get into trouble if I don't get home before my sister."_

"_I'll see you soon," Severus waved bye to her, even though she never saw it. _

"That's how you met?" Dakota asked.

"Yup, just that simple, had to go because I was in trouble like usual," Lily answered. "Next memory."

"_You're late," her father yelled as she stepped through the door. _

"_I'm sorry, it won't happen again," Lily replied, fearing the next move. _

"_You told us that last time," her mother pointed out. _

"_My teacher wouldn't let us out," Lily argued. _

_She saw her father hand rise before she felt his hand on her face. She fell to the ground, her face red. _

Lily turned away, muttering every word her parents said.

"_You need to start behaving like your perfect sister, Mistake. Or I'll teach you how to behave," Her father spat. _

"_It wasn't me. My teacher punished the whole class for Jimmy's misbehavior," Lily pleaded with them, as she stood up. _

_Her father backhanded her again. "Don't lie, mistake."_

"_I'm not a mistake!" Lily yelled. _

"_We said you are a mistake. We're big, you're little. We're right, you're wrong and there is nothing you can do about it," her mother barked a laugh as her father pulled the belt from its place on the wall and started whipping her with it. He didn't care where he hit, as long as it hit her body. After he was satisfied with the results, she was allowed to leave. _

"_Don't you be late again," he screamed in her face. She barely made it to her room before passing out. _

"Oh gosh," Alice covered her mouth as they were pulled out the memory. "We didn't know it was that bad."

"Yeah, it was. They never were physical before that and it was just because I was late to get home. I was forced to go to school the next day even though I had bruises and cuts from my mid back to my calves," Lily said. "It only got worse because I got use to them beating me with a belt, so they realized that I couldn't fight and start hitting and kicking me. Most of the time, they would hit on my until I lost conscience, and they would leave me on the kitchen floor."

Everyone shook their heads. James looked at her with pity in his eyes.

A/n- Next chapter is going to be James seeing how his siblings died, of course from Lily's memories. But while he's in that memory, the others get a chance to talk. =) I hope ya'll like and please please please review. It would make my day. =)


	24. It BURNS!

A/n- new chapter time. Hope you enjoy =).

"Don't look at me like that, please," Lily begged.

"Like what?" they replied.

"With pity in your eyes," Lily answered, turning her back to them.

"Sorry, we just didn't know how bad it was for you," Carissa said.

"That's not as bad as other times," Lily muttered.

"Well, I want to see the worst of it all," James answered.

"Fine," Lily said, placing the memory into a bowl. "Let's go."

_She shut the door as quietly as possible, not wanting to inform anyone of her arrival home. "Where have you been?" her father demanded. _

"_School, like usual," she answered, instantly regretting it. _

"_What did you say," her mother snarled. _

"_School," she tried to cover up her mistake, without success. Her father back-handed her, so she fell to the ground make him think he hurt her. _

"_You speak to us with respect," her mother spat. _

"_Why should I? You don't respect me so I don't respect you," Lily barked. She saw her sister in the kitchen with her boyfriend, laughing at her pain. _

_Her father punched her. She managed to block her mother's fist. She tried to get up, but her mother kicked her in the ribs before she could stand. She stood up, already wore out. Her father took her feet from under her, making her slam into the ground. He placed his foot on her chest, lending most of his weight on her chest. She stayed silent throughout pain, even though it was breaking her bones. She managed to push his foot off her, and punch him before he regained his stance. He barked a laugh, before grabbing her hair. He punched her repeatedly before she got her hair back. The world was threatening to go black, she was unable to stand. She looked down to see that blood covered the floor, worst of all it was her blood. Her father kicked her one last time before he left. _

_Her mother smirked, "You should be more respectful, after all that we do for you."_

_Lily lifted her head and spit blood into her mother's face. "That is what I think of what you do for me."_

_Her mother took a knife and looked down at her daughter. She ran the knife along Lily's back, leaving a gash the length of her back and two inches deep. She walked away laughing, as Lily's sights went black. She heard the door open, and then she felt a pair of hands on her. _

"_Stay with me Lily. You need to open your eyes. Come on talk to me. Please, I need to make sure I'm not too late. Damnit, He'll kill me if I'm too late," Lily recognized his voice but she couldn't talk._

"Who is that?" Sirius asked.

"You can't recognize his voice? It's Severus," Lily answered.

"Who is he talking about when he says 'He'll kill me if I'm too late'?" Alice asked.

"James," Lily answered.

"_Come on Lily, say something. Please," Severus continued to beg as he attempted to stop the bleeding. "Open your eyes." Her eyes opened and she groaned. "I'm not too late. You need to stay with me, Lily." Her eyes were fluttering shut. "No, Lily, open your eyes. Keep them open. That's good, it'll be okay. This will hurt a little but you need to keep your eyes open for me, okay?"_

_She groaned again. "Good," Severus said as he poured something on her back. "You're doing wonderful. A few more minutes and you'll be okay," he promised. _

_She wanted to scream in pain, but she was so weak. "Here, drink," Severus said, holding her up in the sitting position, trying to get her to drink from a glass. _

_He picked her up and took her up to her room, careful not to touch her new scar. "Lay on your stomach, your wound will take a few hours to fully heal. Sleep, I'll stay just in case they try to hurt you again," Severus told her, taking a seat at her desk. _

_She moaned and groaned for a while, but until he didn't hear her whimpers of pain, he knew she wasn't healed. She grew quiet, and he knew that she wasn't in pain anymore. "Severus," she said faintly. _

"_Yes?" _

"_Thanks," she told him. _

"_No need to thank me, I'm supposed to be watching out for you. Now you need your rest, go to sleep. I'll be here until tomorrow," Severus answered, picking up one of her muggle books. _

The memory faded, and the common room came into view. She sat down on the couch nearest to her.

"What the bloody hell is wrong with your parents?" Dakota demanded.

"Me. I wasn't suppose to be born. They only planned for Petunia to be born. They wanted her to be an only child, but I came along. So they punished me for being born, like it was my fault they had me," Lily explained. "After that day, I learned not to speak my mind around them. Even as much as I wanted to, I held my tongue. If it wasn't for Severus healing my wound that day, I would've died. But my parents wouldn't have minded, in fact they would've been happy."

"Now what did you mean when you told us that Snape was scared of James?" Sirius questioned.

"I'm not sure. All I knew was that James knew about Severus lived near me and that James made him vow to protect me," Lily shrugged. "He saved my live on more than one occasion."

"Good then he kept his vow," James said.

"Yeah, he did," Lily replied.

"Why didn't you tell me about us, when I lost my memory?" James asked.

"Because, I didn't want to make you feel like you had to be with me. And that look you get whenever you would look at me. Pity," Lily answered. "I always hated that look."

"We need to do something about your parents," Remus announced.

"No. I won't be seeing them ever again. I'm legal, and I'll make it on my own somehow," Lily

"You won't ever be alone," Dakota answered. "You have us to help you."

"Yes, always, we'll be there for you," Alice agreed.

They all nodded their heads, determined to help. She looked at them with a smile. "Whatever happened to you cheating on me?" James asked suddenly.

"What?" Lily asked.

"Was it my imagination? I mean I think I remember seeing you kissing Snape, and then leaving. But Remus came by and showed me your memory, proving that you didn't. Then we came to the common room and I said something but then I started talking about Raylie. She showed up, holding hands with Ryan. They told me I needed to wake up, something or someone was going to kill me if I didn't wake up," James tried to explain, but he couldn't find just the right words.

Lily looked at Sirius, and then turned to James. "Kill you?" Lily questioned.

"Yes, that's what Raylie said," James looked around the room. "What? What's wrong?"

"We need to go to Professor Dumbledore," Lily put her hand round his wrist.

He pulled his arm out of her grip, "Ouch." She looked at his wrist where her hand had been a moment ago. There were burn marks.

"Oh gosh," Carissa covered her mouth. "We really need to get him to Dumbledore."

A/n- Dum dum dum. How did you like? Please review it would make my day =) What happened to James? Until next chapter, happy Fanficing.


	25. Hmm, what did you do again?

A/n- Before I start with the chapter. To Jessica- Thanks for the review, I really appreciate the review. I'm also glad that you enjoy my story. Sorry the chapters aren't longer, it's a little harder not to give too much away in one chapter, you know? I hope you enjoy it until the end.

"Why do we have to go to Dumbledore?" James asked.

"Because if I touch you, you get burned, that's why," Lily answered. They exited the common room, heading for the headmaster's chamber.

"Wait, maybe we should go tomorrow. It's late and we shouldn't wake Dumbledore," Carissa said.

"It might get worst by then," Remus reasoned.

"Oh okay," the others gave in.

"Come on, hurry up," Lily urged.

"_Tsk, tsk, tsk,_ now why would 8 Gryffindor's be doing out of bed at this hour?"A voice questioned.

Lily immediately recognized the voice as Lucius Malfoy's voice. They turned around to face Lucius Malfoy, Avery, Snape, Bellatrix Lestrange, and Regulus Black, which had their wands pointed at the group.

Lily slipped her wand out of her sleeve, turning to face them. "What do we have to welcome this visit for?" she asked sweetly.

"Oh you know, don't you Evans?" Snape spat. This gave the perfect cover for the others to pull their wands from inside their robes without the others noticing.

The group turned their wands on the Slytherins, "You're out numbered, so give in and go back to your common room," Sirius said.

They pulled out their own wands. "Now you don't want to fight us," Lucius said smugly.

"No I'm pretty sure that I do," Lily answered.

"Trust me, you don't-," Lucius repeated. Before he could finish, Remus had Lucius against the wall by his neck.

"Now, now, now, play nicely," Bellatrix replied in a high pitched voice.

James fell to the ground. "James!" Lily yelled. "What did you do to him?" she demanded, pressing her wand to Bellatrix's throat.

"We told you to play nicely," Avery said. "_Tsk,_ your friend got hurt because you don't know how to play nicely with others.

"What did you do to him?"Lily demanded, shoving her wand further into Bellatrix's throat.

The others followed Lily's lead and advanced on the other three. James' body was in a position that a human body should never be in. "We kept telling you to play nicely," Bellatrix laughed.

Bellatrix went flying backwards, and before she could stand, Lily shot another curse at her. "Tell me what you are doing to James," Lily said. Bellatrix aimed her wand at Lily, but before she could attack, Lily disarmed Bellatrix. "As you were saying," Lily laughed as Bellatrix was forced to dance.

Avery was on the floor, stunned. Regulus was fighting, one on one, with Sirius. Sirius was getting the upper hand in their fight. Remus was fighting with Lucius, unable to get a hit. Carissa and Dakota were fighting Snape, easily getting the better of Snape. Alice looked at Lily, "I'll Remus, if you help Sirius." Lily nodded her approval, before standing by Sirius side.

"No, I want to do this by myself," Sirius yelled at her, dancing between spells.

"We need to finish this quickly," Lily answered. "Let me help you."

He looked at her from the corner of his eyes, letting her know she could help. Within two minutes, Avery, Snape, Bellatrix, and Regulus were bound and sitting against the wall while Frank watched over them. Carissa, Dakota, Remus, Alice, Sirius, and Lily turned their wands on Lucius. They bound him easily, and the group carried the five Slytherins and James to Dumbledore's office.

"Licorice?"

"Lemon Drop?"

"Jelly Beans?"

"Butterscotch?" a staircase was revealed. They walked up the stairs very carefully, and knocked on the door.

"Enter," Dumbledore's voice answered on the other side of the door. Carissa, the only one not carrying someone, opened the door for the others.

They walked in, and set the Slytherins and James down. "What is the meaning of this?" Dumbledore asked peering down his glasses.

A/n- okay I felt like updating again today, since I haven't update in a few. Hoped you enjoyed. I don't think I'm going to update again today. So have a nice day and happy Fanficing. =)


	26. Dumbledore's out of his mind

A/n- To Jessica (again) - Thanks for the review, as always. I enjoy knowing people like my story; it's enough to keep me writing more chapters. I suggest that you get an account so that when I go to reply to you that it'll be sent to your email account, but you don't have to. It's just a suggestion.

It is my spring break. I have an entire week out of school, so I'll be able to update one maybe more times this week. Now for the new chapter hope you like. =)

"We were coming here because every time James is touched, it leaves burn marks. Then on our way here, they stopped us, implying they know what's wrong with James," Lily explained in a rush.

Dumbledore peered over his glasses at the Slytherins. "Are you certain that you leave burn marks on Mr. Potter?"

"Yes, we all saw Lily leave burn marks on his wrist when she touched him," Remus answered, sounding a little aggravated.

"I see, well you go back to your dorms. I'll see you tomorrow morning," Dumbledore said. They stood to leave, about to help James up. "No, no, no, leave him with me. I'm going to try to figure out what is wrong with young Mr. Potter." They nodded towards Dumbledore and exited the room.

"_Tsk_," Dumbledore said. He unbound the Slytherins and waited patiently for them to stand. "I'm going to ask you once and only once for the truth. If I do not feel like you are telling me the truth, I will give you veritaserum. Do I make myself clear?" Dumbledore asked.

"You can't give us veritaserum," Lucius said confidently.

"I can, and I will if you do not tell me the truth the first time. Understand?" Dumbledore peered over his glasses. They looked at each other and then finally nodded. "Now, what have you done to Mr. Potter?"

"Nothing," They said one by one.

"Well, getting burned if someone touches you surely seems like something to me," Dumbledore answered.

"We swear it wasn't us," Snape begged.

"Then you know who did, am I correct?" Dumbledore looked at them closely.

"No," Lucius answered impassively.

Dumbledore raised an eyebrow, "Do I have to use veritaserum on you? Fine, if I must." He poured three drops into each of their mouths.

A/n- yes I know it was short, but I don't want to spoil the truths of all. Please, I would love it if you reviewed.


	27. Moving burn marks

A/n- sorry for the delay, I have been hooked on Percy Jackson and the Olympians for the past couple days. If you haven't read the series, you should. Anyways to the next chapter =) hope you like =)

Dumbledore sat there and watched the group of Slytherins spill their guts. Once they told the headmaster the necessary information, he left them to babble about their worthless lives to one another. They were telling the truth, they only knew that James was cursed but didn't know who cursed him.

He walked a couple laps around James, wondering what type of curse it was. By this time, James was conscience and watching Dumbledore intently. When James felt Dumbledore's hand on his upper arm, he cried out in pain. Dumbledore took his hand away and peered at the damage that had been done.

"Mr. Potter, did you have a dream when you were unconscious?" Dumbledore asked, still looking at James' wounds.

"Yes sir," James replied, rubbing his upper arm. Dumbledore urged him to tell, so he started into his dream. "Well I was in the shrieking shack, and Remus and Sirius found me there. They proved to me that Lily wasn't cheating on me. So I started looking for Lily on the map," He didn't bother hiding anything around Dumbledore, since he probably already knew. "Then I searched for Raylie on the map because I had a gut feeling that it wasn't her. Remus, Sirius, and I went to the common room where Lily and the others were. I made up with Lily and told them about not being able to find Raylie on the map. Suddenly, I hear Raylie's voice behind us. She was holding hands with Ryan. They told me that it was all a dream and that I must wake up or someone was going to kill me. When I tried to ask what they meant, they left and I realized that the others had disappeared too."

"I see," Dumbledore stayed quiet for a few minutes, pondering what his dream had meant.

"What does it mean, Professor?" James asked quietly, looking at Dumbledore, who was lost in his thought.

"I can't say for sure. But I do what you to go to the Hospital wing. Be sure to inform Madam Pomfrey not to touch you. We don't need you with anymore burn marks. If you continue to be touched in the same place, it may cause scarring," Dumbledore made sure to inform him. "Now, hurry along, and try to avoid being touched as much as possible."

James left for the Hospital wing, not really wanting to go. When he walked in, Madam Pomfrey came up to him. "How may I help you, dear?"

"Dumbledore sent me here because every time I get touched, it leaves burn marks," James explained. "Please, don't touch me."

"This will be hard indeed," Madam Pomfrey guided him to a bed. "I will need to touch you once to see exactly what's going on, okay?" When James nodded, she asked, "Where haven't you been touched yet."

He pointed to his left forearm. He wasn't expecting her to touch it that soon so he couldn't brace himself for the pain. "Ouch."

She peered at his arm where she has just touched. It left a moving burn that started at the spot where she had touched up to his wrist, down to his elbow, and back to the original spot. "It appears that whatever this curse is, it wants to cause the most pain possible." She noticed that he was rubbing his arm where she touched. "It doesn't hurt you whenever you touch it?"

"No," James replied.

A/n- sorry guys that it isn't too long. I'm having a slight writers block. Any ideas on the next chapter please feel free to tell me. =) happy Fanficing and PLEASE REVIEW. It will make my day so much better.


	28. NEW CHAPTER!

A/n- To Jessica: Thanks for your reviews for Free as the Water. You were very persistance on me updating this story I hope that you enjoy. I really hope it is worth finishing. So I know it has been awhile since I updated, but I am back to finish what I have started.

James looked to Madam Pomfrey as she started brewing a mix of ingredients. He couldn't tell for sure but whatever she was mixing smelled horrible. It took about three hours before the mix was ready, but when Madam Pomfrey handed it to him, he shallowed it down quickly. "You may have to spend the night here," She muttered. "I'm not exactly sure of the affects of this potion, but it should stop the burn marks."

He said, "I'll take my usual bed, then." She nodded and motioned to the bed in the back of the room.

"I'll send for the head girl to bring you a change of clothes. If nothing happens, then you will be free to go tomorrow afternoon," she said, stalking off towards the Head's dorm.

James laid down on the bed, getting as comfortable as he could. Madam Pomfrey returned a few minutes later, but Lily took her time. Madam Pomfrey decided that it was safe enough for her to go to bed, so she returned to her office and didn't bother coming out.

Lily and the others entered the dorm a few minutes later, but Remus made sure to cast muffliato so Madam Pomfrey wouldn't hear them. "Hey," James greeted, sleppily.

"I brought the clothes, but they insisted on coming to see you as well," Lily muttered softly. James took the clothes from Lily's hand, being careful not to touch her.

"How are you feeling?" Dakota asked.

"I'm fine, just sleepy," he replied, trying to sit up. Lily was about to help him sit up when he reminded her, "I still get burn marks."

She nodded and backed away. "What did she give you?" Carissa asked.

"I don't know. It took her forever to brew it and then she said that I should be able to be released tomorrow afternoon," James replied.

"Do you want company tonight?" Remus asked.

"No, you guys need sleep," James replied. "But I have a question."

"Yes?" Lily asked.

"Was it really a dream that you cheated on me?" James questioned softly.

"Yes, it was. Even if it felt real, it was fake. I never cheated on you," Lily replied.

"One more thing," James said. They nodded. "Give me the map." Remus gave him a speckal look but handed him the map. "I somenly swear I am up to no good," James muttered as he tapped the map.

"What are you looking for, mate?" Sirius asked.

"Raylie," James replied. He scanned every corridor, every secret enterance, every inch of the map but he couldn't find her name. "What house is she in?"

"Hufflepuff," Alice replied.

"She isn't in her dorm, she isn't any where," James replied, throwing the map to Sirius. Sirius and Remus stood together and scanned the map just as James had done seconds before.

"Maybe she is just as michevious as you, and found a secret path out," Carissa suggested.

"I have a feeling that she isn't who she says she is," Sirius replied. "I'm sorry to say that James because I know how much her life means to you."

"I loved every one of my siblings," James replied. "But I have a feeling that you are right."

"How can she be who she is?" Lily asked. "I had the feeling that she wasn't who she said she isn't from the beginning. You saw her die. How could she still be alive when you saw her die?"

"I just wanted it to be true. I wanted Raylie to be alive," James replied. "So I made myself go over the event in my head, trying to figure out when they took her body. I just couldn't get it to fit right."

"I have a feeling that the only reason that they took her body was so they could be her," Alice muttered.

"Polyjuice Potion?" Lily turned to Alice.

"Exactly," Alice replied. Which means that they are keeping her dead body somewhere here. They would need a powerful potion to keep her body from smelling and decaying."

"We should inform Dumbledore of this tomorrow," Frank said.

A/n- Are you happy with the chapter Jessica? I hope you are because it turned out better than I thought it would. Review! 


	29. Sorry to disappoint

If you got to this chapter, I am sorry to disappoint you. This is just another lousy a/n.

I just wanted to let you know that this story has hopes. I am reposting it today. I have twelve chapters written and eight beta'd. I am in the process of writing the thirteen chapter right after I get done posting this.

Please expect the new story to be changed slightly. Nothing to major has been changed thus far. It just contains more vivid details, much better grammar, and better writing styles.

It will BE the same name as this. I am thinking of changing the summary, but for the first few chapters, I won't. Please if you subscribed to this story, go check out the newest one.

It will be updated once a week at the very least. I have motivation to finish it and a solid plotline. My beta, Heart of Spellz, is the most amazing beta ever. She gets my chapters back to me within two days. So expect speedy updates.

Thanks for reading this, because I know I hate a/n's.

MissingMommy


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